Hot Limit - Monologue 2

[bakemonoremy]

Location: Amagi Residence

- A memory, or perhaps within a dream -

 

Hiiro: — Nii-san, I thought ceaselessly about your question from the other day, but…

 

Rinne: Ah? What question?

Hiiro: You asked me something like, “When you grow up, what kind of adult do you want to become, Hiiro?”, didn’t you, Nii-san?

Rinne: Ooh, that. Did you come up with a response to it?

Hiiro: I have.

Rinne: Yeah? Then tell me all about it during our evening meal. If I’ve got that to look forward to, then I’ll be able to blast through today’s studies and governing duties easily.

Hiiro: You always seem to have it tough, Nii-san.

Rinne: It’s not tough, it’s routine work.

Hiiro: Ruuchin?

Rinne: It means it’s bothersome work that tires you out when you do it earnestly, but which you can get through without thinking about it.

Hiiro: Hmm.

Still, work is work; it must be tough. No one your age in the whole village works as hard as you do, Nii-san. I wish I could do something to help you.

Rinne: Just knowing you feel that way is enough for me already, Hiiro.

Hiiro: ………

Rinne: …? Is something still the matter?

Hiiro: M-mh. I just think that I’d like to think about that question a little harder, because I want to come up with a reply that will please you, Nii-san.

Because, if I give the wrong answer, I will disappoint you, Nii-san.

I think that the more you look forward to my response, the bigger your disappointment will be. And, I don’t know how to say it — I don’t want that.

Rinne: Oi oi, you think I’ll reject the response you came up with?

Hiiro: Even if you don’t reject it, Nii-san, I think there’s no point to it if it’s an incorrect answer.

It’d mean that I didn’t answer your question properly —  that I didn’t fulfill my duty.

Rinne: You’re such a handful.

Hiiro: Yes. And you know, Nii-san… I thought about it lots and lots, but there’s so much I don’t know, so I don’t have any confidence in the conclusion I drew.

When you think about it candidly, my future has already been decided for me. You should be well aware of this too, Nii-san. As the younger brother of the village chief, I will be his advisor. There is no other future for me.

Rinne: ...Yeah. Well no, if I died, you’d become the chief in my place.

Hiiro: ………

Rinne: Hmm? Why are you hugging me? Need attention?

Hiiro: It’s because you said you were going to die, Nii-san.

Rinne: My bad. I’m not going to die, and I’m not going anywhere either, so don’t worry.

...So? Were you going to respond with, “As you are well aware, Nii-san, I’m going to become your advisor” with your head held high?

Hiiro: Yes. But, it feels like you’re not going to accept that answer, Nii-san…

After all, there wouldn’t be a point in asking me that question if you wanted to receive such an obvious answer to it.

Rinne: You’re a real clever one, Hiiro.

Hiiro: I’m not. Compared to you, Nii-san, I am stupid. But that’s also why I want to think about it even harder.

But, no matter how hard I think about it, I just don’t get it.

My future has been decided at birth, so any other future would be wrong.

But that “one and only correct answer” may be what you consider a “wrong answer”, Nii-san.

So I just don’t know anymore.

Rinne: Mhm. To amend my earlier statement, you’re so clever that you circle all the way around to being stupid again.

Hiiro: You really say difficult things sometimes, Nii-san.

Anyway. I want to make you happy, Nii-san, so I want to find the answer you are looking for. In order to do that, I would like to hear an example solution I can use as a reference.

Rinne: An example solution...?

Hiiro: Yes. ...Nii-san, what kind of adult do you want to be when you grow up?


Location: Shiina Residence

- Awakening from the dream. Four years ago, in Shiina Niki’s home -

Rinne: ……!

(...It was just a dream.)

(He gets under my skin just rememberin’ him, that Hiiro. It comes naturally to him. What a frightening little brother, leaving scars on the heart of his Onii-chan he’s oughta respect.)

(...How did I even reply to him back then...?)

(Nah, I think back at that point in time the only thing I could’ve come up with was “the same answer as you, Hiiro”... Talkin’ about my dreams just made me feel embarrassed, so I must’ve just dodged the question somehow.)

(When I met that idol in the city later, I was so excited about it that I ended up tellin’ him about my dream, though. But Hiiro probably didn’t believe that this was my “solution”.)

(No, back then I — I’m sure I ended up playing it off as a joke later to gloss over it.)

(‘Cause when you talk seriously about your dreams and then don’t end up achieving them, it’s just embarrassing. And then he’d be the one disappointed in me, since he respects someone like me so much.)

(Even though Hiiro was born just to assist me… Even though he was going to use up his whole life for that purpose…)

(To him, I am his whole life — So if I were to turn out to be a foolish and useless human…)

(That’d be the worst. That’s why I’ll study and train, so I can become a better version of myself. Or at least, that was the plan.)

(I was going to become a proper human being, so strong and undefeatable that I’d be able to achieve any dream.)

(And once I did, I was going to answer you.)

(...But in the end, I just ran out of time. I couldn’t take it anymore and ran away from home.)

(I did something awful to Hiiro, huh… Maybe he’s still waiting for my “example solution”, even now.)

(Since my little brother was raised to be so damn earnest, he probably won’t give me the “response” I want from him until he hears mine.)

(I’m sorry, Hiiro. Seems like your Onii-chan is still not a great enough human to be able to give you the solution to that question with his head held high.)

Niki: Oh, you’re up, huh?

Rinne: ……?

Niki: What a relief~♪ It would have really sucked if you died at my place, y’know! It would’ve looked almost like I killed you or something!

And if the police questioned me about it, I wouldn’t have had a response for them. This really isn’t the same as picking up some stray dog or cat, after all!

It’s not like I could’ve just told them, “I picked him up and brought him home and then he died”!