bakemonoremy

Location: Game Research Club Room

Sora: HaHa~♪ All the deliveries for the day have been completed! Sora is going to return the drone now!

Natsume: Good work todAY. There were a lot of packages this tiME, but we finished delivering them quicker than expectED. It’s proof that you’re getting more skilled at thIS.

Sora: HiHi~, that’s a given since Shisho~ and Senpai are joining forces with Sora~♪

Tsumugi: Fufu. I guess that means even I was just the slightest bit useful.

Natsume: HmPH, of course we need you to be usefUL. If the balance in the account book is off by even a single yEN, I’ll fire you on the spOT.

Tsumugi: Yeah yeah, I’ll be careful.

Natsume: By the wAY, SoRA. You’ve delivered packages to plenty of people by nOW, but has your understanding of that game’s main character deepened yET?

Sora: Hrrmm~mm…?

Natsume: Oh mY, you’re tilting your head in confusiON. Is something on your miND?

Sora: When Sora delivers packages to them, everyone is really happy about it, huh~? Well, it’s hard to tell their “colors” through the camera feed…

Natsume: YeAH, probably because they’ve been transformed into electronic daTA.

When pictures and sounds are turned into electronic daTA, they are transformed into zeroes and onES. By reconstructing them back into pictures and souND, it’s possible to view and listen to the data in a faraway plaCE…

But they’re not the real thiNG, so it’s only logical that they’re differeNT.

Sora: Even without seeing the “colors”, Sora could see everyone’s smiling faces through the drone~.

But why did the game’s main character choose a job where he has to deliver packages even while fighting off monsters? That’s what Sora still can’t understand...

Natsume: I sEE. So the issue lies in that you’re unable to comprehend the fundamental motive behind the main characters’ actioNS.

Tsumugi: That’s the most vital part, isn’t it? Hrmm~mm, if only I was able to tell Sora-kun something that would help here…

Natsume: But assuming that Senpai or I could give you an answer to iT, would that satisfy yOU, SoRA?

Sora: …………

...Sora wouldn’t be satisfied~. Because that wouldn’t mean that Sora really understands his character.

Sora is so happy that Shisho~ and Senpai are helping him out~.

But this is Sora’s job, and he decided to use that chance to do his best to bring attention to Switch.

That’s why Sora is going to think about it by himself for a little longer! And since Shisho~ specially suggested doing “Sora’s Delivery Service”, Sora is sure something will come to mind if he keeps doing it.

Natsume: YeAH, I sEE. I understand your feelings weLL, SoRA.

...That’s how it iS, so don’t say anything unnecessary eithER, SenpAI.

Tsumugi: Fufu. Yes, you’re right.

Natsume: In any caSE, all the deliveries for the day have been taken care oF, so let’s pick up where we left off tomorrOW. Where’s the drone flying about right nOW?

Sora: Ummm? It’s still flying through the hallways~. ...Huh?

Natsume: What’s the mattER, SoRA?

Sora: Hm~, the drone’s camera feed is showing Mika-chan-san~. He’s carrying a really big looking package, and seems to be having trouble with it.

Natsume: Let’s see heRE… AaH, you’re rigHT. A package of that size is completely unsuitable for someone of his statuRE.

Tsumugi: What on earth could he be carrying around?

Sora: Sora is curious too, so let’s talk to Mika-chan-san~!

Location: Hallway

Mika: Huff… huff…

(I… I haven’t been makin’ any real progress here for a while now...!)

(‘Course, I expected carryin’ such a huge package to be a struggle… But I’m all outta breath~! M-my arms are all numb, too~!)

But I need to deliver this no matter what! So I’ll put in all my strength… One, two, let’s go!

Sora: “Let’s go~!”

Mika: Nnah! You gave me a start! Don’t suddenly join in on my encouragin’ cheers, will ya… Err, huh? That sounded like Sora-kun’s voice, but no one’s there?

Sora: “HoHo~♪ Sora is right here! He’s talking to you through the drone~♪”

Mika: Oh, for real! I didn’t even notice the drone pullin’ up to me so close.

...Ah, does that mean this is the rumored delivery service that uses a drone?

Sora: “Yes, it is! Sora was done delivering packages for today, and on the way back he saw Mika-chan-san~♪”

“Sora called out to you because you’re carrying such a heavy package! If you request us to, we’ll deliver it for you, you know~?”

Mika: I see, so that’s why ya talked to me.

Usin’ a drone for a delivery service is real amazin’~♪ And it’s super cool~♪ That said, I appreciate the sentiment, but I’ll be fine on my own.

Sora: “You don’t need the delivery service?”

Mika: Umm, well it did cross my mind to use it, y’know?

But then I heard it’s super popular, an’ I figured you’re packed with orders, so I decided to carry this package by myself.

‘Sides, this package contains somethin’ real precious, so I’d rather deliver it myself. It’s a pain, but it’s not like it’s impossible for a person to carry it to the handicrafts club room on their own.

Sora-kun, thanks for callin’ out to me ♪ But don’t worry yerself over me. Well then, see ya~♪

Location: Light Music Club Room

Rei: My, if it isn’t the young lady. There’s no need to stand in the entrance, why don’t you enter the room?

Aah, the door was left wide open so you couldn’t knock, and were thus unsure how to proceed. It’s okay, there’s no need to fret over this, simply come on in ♪

...Hmm, so you’ve brought me the new training regimen? Thank you, I’ve duly received it.

...Hm? You want to know if you should leave the door open? Fufu, in truth I am currently waiting for something, you see.

...Well, speak of the devil and so on. I hear a faint sound ♪

Sora: “HaHiHuHeHo~♪ Sora’s got a delivery for Rei Nii-san ♪”

Rei: Ooh, I’ve been waiting~, little one. Hmm, I see you really do use a drone for the deliveries.

How very interesting. And on top of that, the delivery was surprisingly prompt.

Sora: “HaHa~, Shisho~ came up with a flawless delivery route! A speedy delivery is what we aim for~♪”

Rei: I see, that’s a good attitude ♪

Oh, did the young lady know about the little one’s delivery service already?

Ah, so this is your first time seeing it. In that case, you came here at the right time.

Whoops, before I get carried away with this lively conversation, I should accept the package that’s been so thoughtfully delivered to me.

Sora: “The sticker on Rei Nii-san’s package says that it should be handled with care! Please be careful as you receive it~.”

Rei: Yes, I am aware. Heave and ho...♪

Kukuku. With this, the premium tomato juice has come into my possession. I can’t wait to drink it right away...♪

Sora: “HiHi~♪ Rei Nii-san’s package has been delivered without incident ♪”

Rei: Thank you, little one. As a reward, I shall give you plentiful headpats the next time we meet ♪

Sora: “You’ll pat Sora’s head? Yaaay ☆”

Rei: Fufu, you’re as cute as ever.

Little one, it seems like you have another delivery after this? Do your best. I’m rooting for you..♪

Sora: “HuHu~♪ Sora will do his best to deliver these packages to all the people waiting for them~♪”

Location: Student Council Room

Keito: I’m finally done with this heap of documents. ...But there are still many heaps left, so I cannot allow myself to lose focus.

Sora: “Knock, knock, knock. Hello~!”

Keito: ...Hm? It feels like I just heard someone’s voice...?

No one’s coming in. Maybe I imagined it… No, I heard it again for sure this time?

Oi, I don’t know who you are, but if you have any business here, come on in already. I can’t take my hands off this heap of documents right now, see.

Sora: “Sorry! Opening the door isn’t possible for me, could you do it~?”

Keito: How dare you tell me to open it. Incorrigible, I just told you a second ago that I can’t take my hands off these documents.

Oi, cut it o-...

Uwoh!? Something’s vigorously-...!? W-wait, is that a drone..?

Sora: “Hello Kei-chan-senpai! Delivery here!”

Keito: Hmm… Does that voice belong to Harukawa? A drone, huh… So that must be the rumored delivery service.

Sora: “Yes! Sora is here to deliver a package addressed to Kei-chan-senpai, please accept it ♪”

Keito: Before I do that… Don’t you know how dangerous it is to barge in here at such a speed! It’d be a disaster if the drone crashed into something.

Sora: “Sora is very sorry. The door suddenly opened, so Sora flew inside too energetically.”

“But this drone won’t crash into anything~♪ It was enhanced to avoid obstacles.”

Keito: But there’s a one in a million chance that it could fail to do that. Good grief…

I’ve heard about you doing this as a part of a school part-time job, but if I notice that you’re acting too recklessly, I’ll have you fired. Keep that in mind.

Sora: “Yes, Sora will take care not to crash into anything.”

Keito: As long as you understand. ...Well, it seems like you did arrange safety measures for what it’s worth. And I must say that taking care of deliveries via drone is quite convenient.

Hmm, this package is addressed to me. But that’s strange, I don’t recall having ordered anything…?

What the-, this is a whole pile of documents! Why did someone send me-… My heaps of documents are gonna pile up even higher!

Sora: “Umm, the sender is Ei-chan-senpai~.”

Keito: What, it was Eichi? ...That guy is going to come to the student council room later anyway, so why did he go through the trouble of sending these via delivery?

...Sigh. He probably just wanted to try using the delivery service that’s been all the rage at school lately.

But I guess it’s true that if Harukawa hadn’t delivered it, someone else would’ve had to carry it here. Harukawa, you were a great help. Thank you.

Sora: “HeHe~, you’re welcome! If you order through us, we’ll deliver anywhere within the school! “Sora’s Delivery Service” appreciates your continued patronage~♪”

Location: Secret Room

Sora: HeHe~♪ The drone is coming back here~.

Just gonna let it fly through the crack in the open door... and stop! Land right there! You’re home~♪

Tsumugi: Ahaha, welcome home~♪ I’m glad the first delivery went over well.

Natsume: YeAH, both the journey there and the way back went smoothLY, SoRA ♪

Sora: That’s because Sora followed the route Shisho~ showed him~♪ Thank you very much!

Natsume: FufuFU, it’s too early to feel conteNT. There are still more packages for us to delivER. Do you remember the next delivery rouTE?

Sora: Yes, perfectly! Sora will deliver the package efficiently!

Natsume: That’s the spirIT, SoRA ♪ And even if something unforeseen happeNS, there’s no need to panIC. Whenever that happeNS, I’ll figure out the optimal route for yOU.

Sora: As expected of Shisho~♪ Sora is counting on you~.

Tsumugi: Fufu. Sora-kun and Natsume-kun are so enthusiastic about this~.

It feels like I’m just working behind the scenes, but I’ll still do my best not to hold you two back ♪

Sora-kun, this is the next package~. Let’s load it onto the drone right away. This one is a little heavier than the last one, so be careful, please.

Sora: Okay! Sora is going to balance it well! Heave-ho, heave-ho...♪

Tsumugi: ...Alright, it’s done ♪

At any rate, using a drone for an express delivery service sure has a curious impact, huh~?

When I watched the feed from the camera earlier, everyone who saw the drone was surprised but delighted about it.

Sora: And Shinobu-chan said the drone is like the jutsu of flying squirrels, and was really excited about it~♪

Tsumugi: Fufu. At first he was shocked and called it an enemy raid, though.

Natsume: ….YeAH. Makes me wonder if mayBE, just mayBE…

Sora: Hmm~? Shisho~, what’s up?

Natsume: I think there’s a chance that “Sora’s Delivery Service” is going to have an explosive increase in populariTY.

While we deliver packages like thIS, everyone’s going to see the droNE. That wAY, the drone basically advertises itseLF.

Tsumugi: Now that you say it, just flying the drone around the school grounds already drew tons of attention.

I could understand it if they wanted to order something themselves upon realizing that the drone is delivering packages. In fact, I kind of want to order something myself ♪

Sora: Sora is so glad we have this drone! The effects are tremendous~♪

Natsume: When people take notice of uS, the orders will come rolling iN, which means that Sora’s opportunities to understand his character better will increaSE.

And on top of thAT, our activity funds will increase as weLL. It’s really nothing but good thinGS...♪

Now that we figured that oUT, let’s appeal to people and keep at it with the deliveriES.

If any last-minute orders come iN, feel free to accept thoSE, SenpAI. This drone is enhancED, so there’s no issue with its durabiliTY.

Tsumugi: Understood ♪

Sora: Okay, then Sora is going to deliver the next package at once! Take-off...☆

Location: Game Research Club Room

- A few days later -

Tsumugi: Uff, I’m finally done taking inventory...♪ There were so many of them today, I thought I’d never finish.

I’m a bit surprised that the amount of orders increased this much in just a few days.

Natsume: I did tell you there’s a chance that the orders will increaSE, so there’s really no need to act all surprised nOW.

Tsumugi: Well, when you’re right, you’re right.

I just never expected there to be so many that it’d become impossible to deal with them in the secret underground room, causing us to have to move our operations to the game club room.

Sora: In a way, that’s another one of the drone’s tremendous effects~♪

Natsume: That’s part of iT, but realLY, it’s owed to Sora doing his delivery work so diligentLY. Good bOY, good bOY...♪

Sora: Ehehe, Sora’s been praised~. Sora will do his best again today ♪

Natsume: With this increased amount of ordeRS, we need to work more efficiently than evER. I’ll ponder the route for todAY, so give me a momeNT.

...HmM, I sEE. YeAH, I think this is going to woRK.

Sora: Has the first delivery destination been decided?

Natsume: YeAH, we’re starting with Rei Nii-san’s place todAY. And I guess after thAT, we can continue on to the student council roOM.

Sora: Understood! Okay then, Sora is going to deliver today’s orders now!

Location: Secret Room

- The next day, after school -

Sora: HaHa~, Sora is making the drone fly a right turn! Whoosh!

HiHi~, next up is a left turn! And now~, forwards, backwards, up, down!

Natsume: Yup yUP, you’re piloting it weLL, SoRA ♪

Sora: Yes! Sora has gotten the hang of it, and now it’s going great~♪

Natsume: I’m glad to hear iT. You’re capable of piloting iT, and the feed from the built-in camera is showing on my screen just like it shouLD.

Doesn’t seem like there’s anything left to adjust on iT, eithER.

Tsumugi: And I’ve finished taking inventory of today’s packages~, we can start delivering them at any time ♪

Natsume: ...SoRA, would you hand me the controller for a secoND?

Sora: Of course! Here you go, Shisho~!

Natsume: Thank yOU ♪

………

Tsumugi: ....Hiyaun!?

W-why are you suddenly making the drone fly at me like that? And at such a high speed, too!

It’s a good thing it changed trajectory at the last second before crashing into me…

Natsume: HmM, looks like the automatic collision avoidance system is also working normalLY.

Tsumugi: Y-you used me to verify that!?

Well, aiming it at Sora-kun is hardly an option, so I guess it’s fine to use me as a guinea pig.

But you could have at least given me a word of warning.

Natsume: Since I was the one who did maintenance on this droNE, there’s no way anything could’ve possibly gone wroNG.

HeRE, SoRA. I’m returning the controllER. This drone is in perfect shaPE ♪

Sora: Thank you, Shisho~! Sora will work hard at “Sora’s Delivery Service”, together with Shisho~ and Senpai!

Natsume: YeAH, let’s do our beST. Alright thEN, SenpAI, can you show me that list of today’s packagES?

Tsumugi: Uh, sure? Umm, here you go!

Natsume: ...HmM. Seems like there are comparatively few packages todAY. That saID, their destinations are all over the plaCE, so we’ll need to deliver them efficientLY.

Checking the floorplan of the schoOL… YeAH, this is the most efficient rouTE.

SoRA, that tiny box over there is going to be the first deliveRY.

Sora: Okay! Ummm, the recipient for this package is… Shinobu-chan! The name of the product is “smoke bombs”...?

Just what one would expect Shinobu-chan to order~♪ Let’s deliver it to him quickly!

Natsume: RigHT, it’s finally time to launch “Sora’s Delivery ServiCE”.

Sora: Time for take-off. HaHiHuHeHo~♪

Location: Sports ground

Shinobu: Sha ta ta ta ta…! Sha ta ta ta ta…!

A ninja must possess good running ability. And therefore, I am once again practicing my ninja run in order to fortify it~.

One lap around the track…! Two laps…! Thre-...

Um, huh?

S-something is flying over here! Could it be an enemy raid!?

This is bad! N-no, I am a ninja who never neglects his training, which means I can even make short work of something like an enemy r-...

Uwahn! It’s coming closer at an incredible speed~!

Sora: “HaHa~♪ It’s not an enemy raid! It’s a drone!”

Shinobu: Eh, a drone…?

Ooh, so that’s what it is. I’ve heard of drones before, but this is my first time seeing one ♪

Rather, isn’t that Harukawa-kun’s voice I’m hearing? But I can’t see him anywhere…?

Sora: “HiHi~♪ That’s because Sora is operating the drone from somewhere else ♪ Sora is here to deliver this package to Shinobu-chan!”

“Sora started a delivery service together with Shisho~ and Senpai ♪ And Shinobu-chan is our first recipient~♪”

Shinobu: Oh, these are the smoke bombs I ordered!

They’re generally used as ninja tools, but Taichou-dono told me he wants to investigate whether they’re suitable to be used during a live performance, so I ordered some~.

I didn’t think they’d be delivered so soon ♪

And the way they were brought here by a drone in the sky, it’s like the jutsu of flying squirrels*!

Thanks for delivering it, Harukawa-kun ♪ Package received.

Sora: “HuHu~♪ Delivery complete~♪ We hope you’ll use our service again!”

Shinobu: Uwah, it flew off in the blink of an eye! How cool…♪

--------------------------

* “Musasabi no Jutsu” (lit. Art of Giant Flying Squirrels) is a ninja technique that involves slowing your descent by holding onto a parachute-like fabric with your hands and feet.
Here’s an illustration:

Location: Library

Tsumugi: Ummm..?

Aah, there it is. It got mixed up into that other author’s shelf on accident.

One kanji aside, the names of these two authors are identical, so students sometimes return their books to the wrong shelf~.

Just gotta put that book back on the correct shelf… There. Alright, with this, I pretty much finished organizing the books for today ♪

All that’s left are the bottom shelves.

Oh, huh? If it isn’t Anzu-chan.

Ah, you came to return these books before their loan periods expire~. Fufu, thanks for conscientiously abiding by the library rules.

Okay, they’re all here and accounted for...♪ I’ll be putting these books back in their cozy homes, then.

...Hm? What’s wrong, why are you grabbing my sleeve?

Hum, hum. Aah, you also want to borrow some new books. Of course, I’d be delighted ♪

If you tell me what kind of books you’re looking for, I can recommend some…

Ah, uwah!?

S-s-s-something just flew over my head at breakneck speed and almost grazed me!

I turned around, but there’s nothing to see! W-what on earth was that?! A bug, a bird, or maybe a plane~!?

...Huh? It looked like a drone to you, Anzu-chan...?

Ah, looks like it’s coming back here.

...Hmm? I guess it really is a drone. But what’s a drone doing in the library…?

Oh? Now it’s flying right up to us. It looks like it’s carrying a book…?

Sora (not visible): “HaHa~! Sora is here to return this book!”

Tsumugi: Wawah, the drone suddenly let out a voice!

Umm… Is that voice by any chance Sora-kun?

Sora (not visible): “Yes! When you’re called by your name, you respond!”

“Senpai, Sora is sorry for startling you earlier! Sora isn’t used to these steering controls yet, so he went too fast~.”

Tsumugi: Ahaha. Incredible, we can actually hold a real conversation through this drone ♪

Yup yup, it certainly was exceedingly dangerous, but it’s okay since you didn’t actually crash into me.

Natsume (not visible): “As if the drone could ever crash into yOU. It’s equipped with an enhanced obstacle detection and evasion systEM, you knOW.”

“Or maybe I should supplement it with a new system that doesn’t consider Senpai in particular an obstacLE ♪”

Tsumugi: But that would mean that it would only crash into me. How cruel! And so dangerous, too!

...Huh? Just now, Natsume-kun’s voice sounded like it came from somewhere really close by…

Sora (appearing): HiHi~♪ Sorry for intruding!

Natsume (appearing): SheeSH, you made way too much of a fuss over that drone flying at yOU, SenpAI.

Tsumugi: Ah, Sora-kun and Natsume-kun, you came all the way here. Hello~♪

Natsume: We already saw your face through the drone’s cameRA, so spare me the greetinGS, will yOU.

Hey theRE, little kittEN. Of courSE, I could also see you clearLY ♪

Tsumugi: Uu, I saw this coming, but the way you treat the two of us really is like night and day.

Sora: Senpai, Sora is still waiting for you to accept this book~? Deliveries need to be transferred to their final destination!

Tsumugi: Deliveries? Aah, so all I need to do is accept the book from the drone as it’s landing?

In that case, if you’ll allow me. Hup...

Sora: HuHu~! Senpai received the book! Delivery complete!

Natsume: YeAH, a job well doNE ♪ You were successfully able to return the book I borrowED.

Judging from this rest rUN, nothing will stand in the way of “Sora’s Delivery Service”’s launCH.

Tsumugi: “Sora’s Delivery Service”...? Hmm~, for some reason I can’t follow the conversation in the slightest, just what is going on here?

Sora: Sora has gotten a job as a campaign boy for a game! It’s a popular game about flying on rifles and delivering packages~♪

Tsumugi: Aah, you mean that famous game? Even I’ve heard of that one ♪ And you’re going to be the campaign boy for it? That’s amazing, Sora-kun.

Sora: HeHe~, it seems like Sora looks just like the main character of that game, so he’s supposed to become that character!

But in order to do that, Sora needs to understand the character a lot more!

Tsumugi: Hmm, I see…? I think I’ve gotten the gist of it. So basically, that’s why you’re doing this “Sora’s Delivery Service”?

Sora: Yes! In order to understand his character more, Sora is going to work the same delivery job as the main character!

Natsume: Only within the range of the school grounDS, thouGH. There happened to be school part-time jobs open for iT, and we are planning to take on every single one of thEM.

And we just so happened to have this drone that we inherited from the Game Club graduate during the development of the SVRS, which I enhanced in a number of waYS.

Tsumugi: I see~. The drone startled me when it flew past me initially, but the package was successfully delivered in the end.

And above all, doing an express delivery service via drone sounds fun ♪

Fufu, you think so too, Anzu-chan?

Alright, after hearing your explanation, I’d be glad to lend a hand ♪ Although I may only be fit to do the book-keeping and receptionist duty.

Natsume: If you’re capable of doing those thinGS, it’s already plenTY. Even though it’s yOU, SenpAI.

Senpai: Eeh, I can’t tell if you’re praising or belittling me!

Sora: HoHo~♪ Then Sora is in charge of flying the drone and delivering the packages, and Shisho~ will give the directions for the most efficient delivery routes~♪

He’ll also do maintenance on the drone!

Natsume: And that’s thAT. Very weLL, since we’ve come to an agreemeNT, the operations of “Sora’s Delivery Service” can begin in earnest starting tomorrOW...♪

Location: Game Research Club Room

Sora: HaHa~♪ Shisho~, hello! When you enter a room, you greet the people inside!

Natsume: HeY, SoRA. I’ve been waiting for yOU ♪

Sora: HiHi~♪ Shisho~, why did you call Sora here? Could there be a new job for Switch~?

But in that case, isn’t it strange that Senpai isn’t here?

Natsume: WeLL, I told him to join uS, but he said he’s tied up with doing Library Committee work and can’t coME.

SheeSH, isn’t this way too impertinent of SenpAI?

WeLL, since Sora is heRE, that’s already plenty for mE ♪ Shaggy Glasses would just be an extra anyhOW.

Sora: Hm~? Does that mean you only need to talk to Sora?

Natsume: That’s rigHT. As a matter of faCT, a job offer for you has come iN, SoRA. They would like to know if you want to be the campaign boy for a certain gaME.

Sora: A campaign boy for a game..? Sora is curious what kind of game it is!

Natsume: Fufu, do you know this oNE, SoRA?

Sora: HuHu~! Of course! That’s a really famous game~♪ Sora plays this series all the time!

Natsume: I sEE. The first installment of the series was released a fairly long time aGO, but it saw a resurgence in popularity thanks to online reviews and is now considered highly populAR ♪

The game revolves around the main charactER, who rides a flying rifle through the sky and defeats monsteRS, all while delivering packages he’s been entrusted with to their destinatioNS.

Sora: Yes! The way he flies about in the sky, up and down, looks like it’d feel good!

Natsume: I get what you meAN. Being able to fly around like that would probably make you feel like you’re in a dreAM ♪

They said they’d release another game in this series in a few yeaRS, and it’s going to be an online game with a focus on having stellar graphiCS. I have high expectations for iT.

In order to increase their market share furthER, it looks like the company behind it is planning a campaign to go along with the releaSE.

And that’s where Sora comes iN. They’d like you to become the protagonist and perform as him in evenTS.

Sora: HeHe~, so they’re asking for Sora as an individual? But why~?

Natsume: The main character in the new game is apparently the spitting image of yOU, that’s wHY.

Remember how we launched the Switch VR systEM, SVRS for shoRT, with Yuuki-kun the other dAY*?

The graduate from the Game Club who helped us back then is involved with the development of this gaME, you sEE.

ApparentLY, he saw you during the explanatory meeting for the SVRS’s speCS.

FuFU, it seems that you resembled the game’s main character so much he was completely flabbergastED. After thAT, he sent you this formal work request through the schoOL.

I think it sounds like a good opportuniTY, but of course it’s up to you whether you want to take on this job or nOT, SoRA.

Sora: HoHo~! Sora is so happy to have received a job offer! And if Sora works hard at that job, it’ll put Switch in a good light~♪

Natsume: Yep yEP, you’re absolutely rigHT. As expected of yOU, SoRA ♪

I guess that means it’s okay for me to formally accept this job for yOU. I’ll get in touch with thEM.

Sora: Yes! Thank you, Shisho~!

Natsume: You’re welcoME. I can’t wait to see Sora turn into that game’s main charactER...♪

Sora: ……….

Natsume: ...Hm? What’s the mattER, SoRA? You seem lost in thought all of a suddEN.

Sora: Sora decided to accept the job offer! But, what does Sora have to do to become that game’s main character..?

Sora has never flown on a flying rifle, nor has he ever fought with a monster~?

Natsume: WeLL, I don’t think there’s anyone who ever had those kinds of experiencES. But you’re not satisfied with thAT, rigHT?

Sora: Exactly! Sora wants to understand that character better! Does Shisho~ have any advice how Sora can do that?

Natsume: FufuFU. To that question I can only reply “YeS”. In faCT, I predicted this course of events and already came up with a plan for what to do neXT.

Sora: Uwaah! Shisho~ really is amazing! What kind of plan is it~?

Natsume: I call it “Sora’s Delivery ServiCE” ♪

Sora: “Sora’s Delivery Service”? That gives off a fun “color”~♪

Natsume: I thought that if you were to carry out the same job as the main character from the gaME, your understanding of him would deepen for suRE.

Within this schoOL, countless items are delivered every day in persON.

On some daYS, the amount of packages is so high that the school offers part-time delivery jobs to studeNTS.

I am planning to accept this part-time job together as SwitCH. WeLL, I don’t expect anything from SenpAI, but I’m going to get him involved anywAY.

If it goes weLL, we can also earn some money for Switch’s activity funDS. It’s two birds with one stoNE...♪

Sora: HaHiHuHeHo~! Sora’s gonna have his own delivery service!

Natsume: AhaHA. The way you announced that while raising both of your arms as high as you cAN… You’re too cuTE, SoRA ♪

-------------------------------

* Referring to Summer Flowers

Location: Resting Area

- The day of the showdown -

Rinne: So, Kohaku-chan. Did you find a nice, proper job?

Kohaku: Ehem. Clean your eyes and have a good look, y’all! This is it!

HiMERU: --This is… A collaboration with a honey maker?

Niki: Honey! Nice! I love honey-lemon jelly, tea with honey and honey-mustard chicken. And it tastes great in a ginger-fried pork dish or even a curry.

Also, it’s already plenty delicious by itself on warm toast. It’s the best ☆

Rinne: Hmmm. A music collaboration in a commercial, huh… That honey maker’s not super famous, so the pay isn’t much to rave about… So, why’d you choose this one?

Kohaku: Well, it’s not like we’re famous either yet. It’s a standard practice to promote new songs through collaborations in commercials.

And the goods they sell in this collab are honey -- Which is related to our unit name, so folks will be able to remember the name Crazy:B easily.

HiMERU: --Indeed. HiMERU thinks that this reasoning holds up well.

Kohaku: And then there’s this. Did y’all know? There’s been a bit of a honey boom among female influencers lately.

It’s an overlappin’ clientele with our target group.

Niki: Aah, now that you say it, they do say honey has some beautifying properties. As an ingredient, it’s popular among women~.

Rinne: Hmm ♪ This is better than the last one, but I’m not completely sold on it.

Kohaku: That was my first impression of this job, too. But actually, there’s this certain actor who’s gonna be havin’ an appearance in this commercial as well.

Niki: Hmm? Never heard of them. Are they a big name or something?

HiMERU: -- If HiMERU’s memory serves right, they’re a newcomer. But that means they don’t have the influence to bring in a lot of popularity…

Kohaku: Well, y’see. There are certain rumors on the internet that this actor is gonna be starrin’ in a super highly-anticipated movie that’s gonna be announced next month.

If that’s true, then they’ll definitely rise to popularity real soon!

Which means that as an inevitable result, our commercial is goin’ to garner some attention as well, right? So I looked into it to see if those rumors were the real thing.

-- And from what I found out, the rumor seems mighty credible.

HiMERU: --That makes sense. This way of choosing a job couldn’t have been done by anyone but Oukawa. HiMERU and the others aren’t that well-versed in online spheres, after all.

Rinne: Hey, not half bad! I like it ♪

Kohaku: How d’you like them apples! Your turn, Rinne-han. I’ll take it you brought a mighty good one?

Rinne: After hearin’ that, I can’t let you down! Everyone, pay close attention!

This is what I’ve got! Tadah~☆

Kohaku: Did my eyesight get worse or somethin’? ‘Cause it looks to me like Rinne-han isn’t showin’ us anythin’.

HiMERU: --Your eyesight is fine, Oukawa. HiMERU doesn’t see anything, either.

Niki: Sheesh~! Rinne-kun. I told you they’d be pissed if you showed up empty-handed~!

Kohaku: Hey… What’s the meanin’ of this? Dependin’ on your answer, you might have me to reckon with, got it?

Rinne: Now, now. No need to live fast ‘n die young! Hear me out to the end. Once you see where this is goin’, you’ll definitely acknowledge that Kohaku-chan’s lost this match!

Kohaku: Spare us the pontifications and explain yourself already.

Rinne: Did you know? Among bees, there are hard-workin’ bees, bees that work a normal amount, and bees that slack off and basically do no work whatsoever. The distribution of these is 2:6:2.

But when you remove the bees that don’t do any work at all and once again divide the rest into hard workers, those who work a normal amount, and slackers, the distribution is still 2:6:2!

HiMERU: -- There may be some slight alterations to it, but this sounds like the “Pareto principle*”.

Kohaku: ...I think I know what the punchline’s gonna be here, but I’ll let you finish just in case. --Go on?

Rinne: So basically, what I’m sayin’ is: In proportion to how much I didn’t do jack shit, the effort Kohaku-chan put into findin’ a good job increased! It’s all thanks to me ☆

Which means there’s no doubt that the winner of this match is Rinne-kun!

Kohaku: Quit screwin’ arouuuund! You utter nincompoop! As-friggin’-if!

HiMERU: --Sigh. So Shiina’s prediction was spot on…

Niki: I know, right~? It was a “crapshoot”, just like I said, wasn’t it~?

HiMERU: On another note, Amagi. If HiMERU’s memory serves right, this story you told us is actually about ants, not bees.

Rinne: Huh, for realsies? Well, ants and bees are pretty similar, so don’t sweat the details!

Put a pair of wings on an ant, and what do you get? A bee. And anyhow, they’re both insects ♪

Kohaku: These aren’t details we’re sweatin’! I’ll teach you to mess around and spout bogus like that! Not a single inch of this was thanks to the likes of you, got it!?

This job is somethin’ I got “all by myself”!

HiMERU: (! My, isn’t that something…)

(Guess you got a better result than anticipated, Amagi.)

--Now then, HiMERU would say this match is settled.

HiMERU thinks that Oukawa is the unanimous winner of this contest.

Niki: Agreed~! I also vote for Kohaku-chan.

Rinne: Hey, what gives. Don’t betray me, Niki! Aren’tcha on my team!?

Kohaku: Ko ko ko ♪ No one here’s on your side. Game, set and match, Rinne-han. Now what am I gonna make you do for the penalty game~♪

Rinne: Guh, you’re all gangin’ up on me, how cruel! This is the first step to how bullyin’ starts, y’know? Rinne-kun says NO to bullyin’!

Kohaku: Fufun ♪ Serves ya right!

Niki: Aw ma~n. I knew this was gonna happen, but here comes the penalty game. I’m gonna get so hungry…

HiMERU: --Fufu.

--What a truly eloquent and cunning man. In the end, Oukawa-- No, all of us, won the game, but lost the match against him.

Niki: Hmm? Are you talking about Rinne-kun?

HiMERU: --Who knows?

Niki: ………..

Location: Practice Room

- The following day -

Rinne: How come I have to do this fuckin’ clean-up job... I’m such a poor thing.

Makin’ the penalty game “cleaning up”, Kohaku-chan must be the personification of evil². Doesn’t anyone feel bad for poor little Rinne-kun…!

Niki: You’ve had it coming, Rinne-kun. I’m the one you should be feeling bad for~, I got completely dragged into all this--

Wh-, ugyAH!?

What’re you swinging that mop around for!? Uwah, that was close!?

Rinne: I suddenly got pissed off ‘cause I remembered how you betrayed me, Niki ♪ Have a taste of how well I handle my stick³!

Niki: You can really do just about anything, huh!? Gimme a break, don’t take your irrational anger out on me!

...Ah. That reminds me, there was something I meant to ask you, Rinne-kun.

Rinne: Ahn? What’s up?

Niki: Could it be that you only instigated all of this as an act, to help Kohaku-chan build some self-confidence?

Rinne: ...I’ve got no clue what you’re talkin’ about. I just like a good gamble, that’s all ♪

Ah, sayin’ that made me wanna go play some pachinko! Come on Niki, let’s get this done and over with and hit up the parlor!

And of course, Niki’s gonna sponsor me! I said so, which means it’s decided! So let’s finish this clean-up at mach-speed and bounce ☆

Niki: I see. So that’s how it is…

Aw ma~n. It’s like Rinne-kun always gets the last laugh, how unfair…

Rinne: Niki, you little shit! Quit mutterin’ under your breath and get those hands movin’! All the good machines are gonna get taken if we don’t get a wiggle on!

Kyahahaha ☆ I feel like today’s gonna be my lucky day!

---------------------------

* Pareto principle

² He uses the same 鬼 here that Kohaku used earlier in his “there’s good people everywhere” line. An ongoing theme?

³ Innuendo aside, he’s doing Bōjutsu

Location: Café “Cinnamon”

Niki: Rinne-kun.

Rinne: ♪~

Niki: Hey, Rinne-kun!

Rinne: Aahn? Damn, why so noisy? Are you lonely when Rinne-kun doesn’t pay attention to you?

Aw~, there, there. Sorry, but I’m real busy right now.

Niki: All you’re doing is trespassing into a café on its closing day and loitering around reading magazines. You’re making it hard to clean the place.

Rinne: I can just move out of the way for that, ‘s all good. Look, look, you missed a spot! I don’t approve such sloppy cleanin’ practices!

You heard me, so make like a worker bee and get busy ♪

Niki: You’re such a nag… I wanna get the cleaning over with before I get hungry, so I’d like to get back to it as soon as possible. But y’know, I can’t help but wonder.

Is this really the time for you to be reading magazines all leisurely? Ever since the contest started, all I’ve seen you do is gamble and laze around.

It’s almost time for us to show the job we found to Kohaku-chan, right~?

Rinne: Oh, now that you say it, the deadline’s approachin’ fast.

Kyahahaha ☆ The day of the crucial match, huh. Gets me hyped! Can’t wait to see if Kohaku-chan managed to find a proper job...♪

Niki: Why’re you talking like a dad on parents’ day* at school. You realize that you’re a participant in the contest too, right, Rinne-kun?

You were the one who told me, “Just take it easy, Niki, ‘cause I’ll find us a job”. And yet you’re not doing anything.

We’ll both be held liable if we lose the match, and I don’t wanna do the penalty game~.

Rinne: It’s all a-okay ♪ Don’t worry ‘bout it. ‘Cause I’ve got an infallible “secret plan” up my sleeve. See, you’re in good hands!

Niki: Eeh…? A gambler’s “secret plan” is just about the most anxiety-inducing thing I’ve ever heard of.

Rinne: Oioi, isn’t that a little too harsh? I guess if you have that little confidence in me, you could always start lookin’ for a job on your own?

Actually, why is it on me to do the dirty work anyhow?

Niki: The way you said that with such an innocent look in your eyes made it hurt all the more! Rinne-kun, are you serious right now!?

Rinne: Yup yup. This totally goes against all laws of nature! Now I get it.

If “Crazy:B” stands for crazy bees, that makes Niki the worker bee, and I’m the drone² that gets waited upon!

That’s why you’re the one who should be workin’ his ass off! Work, work~ ♪ Kyahahahaha ☆

Niki: Nothing gets through to this guy! And actually, that’s the queen bee, not the drone, right...?

Location: Staff Canteen

Niki: --And that’s what happened.

HiMERU: ………….(Rolling his eyes)

Kohaku: ...Well, you’ve got me speechless.

That dimwit, after he acted all high and mighty towards me! He’s really lookin’ down on me, ain’t he!

HiMERU: This reminds HiMERU, he once heard that in English, “a drone” means “a person who does no useful work and lives off others”. That does sound like Amagi.

Kohaku: Ko ko ko, good one. It fits him like a glove ♪

--Wait, this ain’t the time for jokes.

...Hm? Bees...? Speakin’ of bees, there was this one job…

Umm, where’s the HoldHands page for it..

Niki: Kohaku-chan, what’s the matter? What’cha suddenly checking HoldHands for?

Kohaku: …………

Yeah. This might work… It’s worth checkin’ out in more detail, I think.

Niki: Checking what out?

Kohaku: HiMERU-han, Niki-han! Some urgent business came up, so I’ve gotta skedaddle!

Niki: Huh? Well, you already paid for your meal, so I’m fine with it… But what’s up?

Kohaku: That’s a secret for now! So long~♪

HiMERU: --My, my, he left in quite the hurry. Seems like Oukawa’s got a flash of inspiration.

Niki: Seems like it. Well, it’s great to see Kohaku-chan in high spirits like that.

Guess that means our loss is already set in stone, then.

HiMERU: Fufu. You’re unexpectedly gracious in defeat, Shiina. But HiMERU thinks this match is not yet settled.

Niki: You think? Pretty sure we’re done for. After all, we are lacking the most vital thing: a job.

HiMERU: --HiMERU is worried about that “secret plan” Amagi mentioned, though.

Niki: Oh right, he did say something like that, huh?

But this is Rinne-kun we’re talking about, so rather than a “secret plan” it’s probably a “ridiculous crapshoot”.

If you’ll remember, this is the kind of guy who has no problem saying stuff like “The foolproof way of winning any gamble is to double your bet after every loss³! So lend me some money ♪”, right?

HiMERU: --HiMERU hopes that this will turn out to just be his needless anxiety at work.

---------------------

* Parents’ day in Japan involves the parents of the students observing their children in class.

² From Wikipedia: “A drone is a male honey bee. Unlike the female worker bee, drones do not have stingers and gather neither nectar nor pollen. A drone's primary role is to mate with an unfertilized queen.”

³ This is the Martingale betting system.

Location: Staff Canteen

- A few days later -

Kohaku: Hrmm~... Hrmmmmm~...

(It’s no good. I’ve been glowerin’ at HoldHands all this time, but everythin’ on there looks good, but also bad, in a way.)

Is this what’s commonly known as Gestaltzerfall*? Nah, maybe not…?

I don’t even know anymore! I don’t know anythin’! This world is chock-full of incomprehensible stuff~!

HiMERU: --You’ve been working hard, Oukawa. Do you mind if HiMERU sits with you?

Kohaku: Uwah!? HiMERU-han? When you called out to me from over my shoulder I got so startled I thought my heart was gonna jump right outta my throat!

HiMERU-han, are you aboutta eat lunch? If you’re fine with sittin’ at the foot of the table, go right ahead ♪

HiMERU: --HiMERU is sorry for startling you. Thank you for the seat. HiMERU is going to have the same daily special that Oukawa is eating, then.

Just going to open HoldHands and order -- There. How convenient.

Kohaku: HiMERU-han, how’d you know I was sittin’ over here anyway? Even though it’s so packed in here durin’ lunchtime.

HiMERU: Fufu. When HiMERU came to the canteen to have his lunch, he overheard Oukawa yelling from over here. HiMERU could tell right away that it was you.

Kohaku: Eh, was I bein’ noisy!?

HiMERU: Oh, you didn’t notice? You were making a real fuss ♪ The people around you are already giving you strange looks.

Kohaku: Aah… You’re right. How embarrassin’. To think I didn’t even notice what was goin’ on around me…

HiMERU: --It only goes to show how serious you are about this. In any case, from your reaction, HiMERU guesses that you have yet to find a job that stands out to you.

How is your progress? HiMERU would like to hear all about it.

Kohaku: Aah, well... I’ve sent out tons of applications since then and all, but…

Those led to some negotiations? And I’ve had a rough goin’ of it…

HiMERU: --Hmm. What do you mean by negotiations?

Kohaku: Ah, I wasn’t makin’ unreasonable demands or anythin’.

Every job has pros and cons in their terms, and I was just tryin’ to change some of the cons into pros for us…

But they seemed to take offense at all that.

I was just tryin’ to offer a counter proposal, y’know? I wonder why they wouldn’t accept my suggestions…

HiMERU: --A counter proposal means compromising and conceding things. HiMERU supposes that this means the other side has no intentions of meeting us halfway.

Kohaku: I guess you’re right. Sigh…

Negotiations exist so both parties can sound out each others’ real intentions, right? I’m good at readin’ adults’ faces. Well, I guess that’s due to the environment I was raised in.

But when I speak my mind it just causes offense, and on the other hand, to give in means to lose… So in the end, every single job I had my eye on fell through durin’ negotiations.

Now I’m back at square one, and lookin’ for job postings again.

HiMERU: Hmm. So that’s how it went.

--Negotiations are no easy feat. And it’s difficult to do them just by reading the other person’s expressions.

Their viewpoint, the times, the circumstances, their behaviour. You must pay attention to all of these things as well.

Kohaku: It’s a mighty tough world out there… I was way off, thinkin’ “There’s good people everywhere ya look”... Actually, there ain’t a good person to be seen anywhere.²

Niki: Hey~, sorry for the wait~. One daily special for HiMERU-kun, right?

HiMERU: --Thank you very much.

Kohaku: Oh, so you’re part-timin’ here today? You’re quite the eager beaver.

Niki: It’s my life’s work after all ♪ And it rules, ‘cause I get to use the kitchen here as much as I like, and I get a share of the ingredients so I never miss a meal ♪

I’ve decided to live and die in the kitchen!

Kohaku: ...The longer I’ve known you, the more it’s beyond me why you’re even an idol.

Niki: It’s completely beyond me too!

Anyway, you two sure seem down in the dumps. Ah~, it must be ‘cause you’re hungry! If you want, I can whip up a real feast³ for you~!

Kohaku: Uweh… Nah, no need. I couldn’t eat another bite. Niki-han, don’t just assume that people are gloomy ‘cause they’re hungry. That only applies to you.

HiMERU: --Aah, you came at a good time. Let’s do some reconnaissance ♪

Shiina, how is Amagi’s job search progressing?

Niki: Hmm? Ah~, is this about the contest? To be honest, we haven’t decided on anything yet.

Kohaku: Whaaat? What the heck, after he talked himself up mighty big, too.

...Oho. So even for the great Rinne-han, findin’ a job ain’t a cake walk?

Niki: Hm~... Actually, it’s more like Rinne-kun is procrastinating. We talked about it two days ago--

---------------------

*Gestaltzerfall refers to a psychological phenomenon where if you stare at a kanji (which is made up of several smaller shapes) for too long, the shape seems to “decompose into its constituting parts”. Like how when you hear a word so often it starts to lose its meaning.

² This references his Idol Story, where he uses the expression “渡る世間に鬼はない” (lit. there are no demons in the world). This time he corrects himself, saying there’s nothing but demons here.

³ The (probably idiomatic) expression he uses is the Manchu-Han Imperial Feast which consists of over 300 dishes served over the span of three days, including monkey brain, leopard fetuses, peking duck and camel’s hump among lots of others.

Location: Café Area

Rinne: Hey, Kohaku-chan? Why did you choose this job?

Kohaku: Huh? Look closely. The client for this job is a major advertising firm. So regardless of whether there’s a reason to take on this job or not, there shouldn’t be anythin’ speakin’ against it.

Rinne: If the only reason you chose this job is ‘cause it’s got a bigtime client, it’s no good at all. Zero points.

Kohaku: Hah?

HiMERU: --Oukawa. If it’s such a good job, then how come no one took it on and it still remains posted?

If the conditions for the job were that good, HiMERU thinks everyone would scramble to take it on.

Niki: And the pay isn’t that great either… Since they’re such a major company, how should I put it… They must be real stingy or something.

Kohaku: Uguh…

Rinne: Well, there you have it.

And look at the other companies involved in that job. They’re all complete small fries.

In terms of influence, it’s “one strong, many weak”. Well, they probably set it up like that on purpose.

That big time firm’s got a monopoly there, so the best you can hope for at that job is to be chewed up and spat out by ‘em, and then tossed into the trash.

Kohaku: Uuu… --T-then! How about that one!? There should be nothin’ to criticize about the payment for that one!?

Rinne: That one’s out of the question. If we took it, we’d barely get any screen time, and it’s got basically no merits for us whatsoever.

Kohaku: Ugugu…

HiMERU: --Oukawa. Finding a profitable job is always difficult the first time around. HiMERU believes you can put this experience to good use next time.

Niki: Well, yeah. They say failure is a something-or-other to success, right. Cooks figure out the right amount of seasoning through trial and error, too.

Isn’t it just the worst when a recipe calls for “a pinch” of something?

Rinne: You two are too soft on him. Soft and fluffy like a marshmallow!

Kohaku-chan. Earlier, if you had given me a good reason as to why you chose that job, I would’ve been fine with takin’ it on, you know?

But from what you told me -- You only chose it ‘cause it “happened to be there”.

Kohaku: T-that ain’t true…

Rinne: In that case, can you still throw your chest out and say with pride that you took it on? If you can’t, then I won’t acknowledge that you “took on a job”!

Kohaku: ………..

Rinne: Use your head. If you don’t make use of your brain and your heart, they’ll grow rusty. Before long, you’ll be unable to distinguish between anythin’ at all.

And that couldn’t even be called “livin’”. You’d just be existin’ while breathin’, that’s it.

There’s tons of people who want to use guys like that. In this world it’s eat or be eaten after all.

So quit renouncin’ your ability to think.

Otherwise you’ll really end up being used as some big bad grown-ups’ doll, got it? --Like a certain someone.

Kohaku: ………..

HiMERU: --Amagi. Don’t you think you went a little bit too far?

Rinne: Well, whatever. Think it over, Kohaku-chan.

Niki: Huh? Where are you going, Rinne-kun?

Rinne: The mood’s all ruined now. I’m gonna go play some pachinko or somethin’. See ya!

Niki: Huh!? Hey wait, Rinne-ku~n? ...Ah, he’s gone.

Well, since that leaves the outcome of the half-finished board game undecided, it’s a lifesaver for me ♪

Kohaku: ………..

HiMERU: --Oukawa. HiMERU thinks there’s no need to let what Amagi said get to you too much.

Kohaku: ...Huh? Aah, I’m fine. I think what Rinne-han said was pretty reasonable.

It’s just like he said -- I only chose it because it “happened to be there”.

The reason why I kept my mouth shut was because I was thinkin’ about myself. How I reeeally wasn’t thinkin’ at all before--

Nah, maybe I’m always tryin’ to get away with bein’ like that…

Sigh… I’ve finally gained “freedom”... And yet, it’s like those stains from my past won’t fade.

I feel like I’m forever bound by somethin’ invisible, and it disgusts me.

HiMERU-han, do you have some time to spare for me? I’d like to try havin’ another look around…

HiMERU: --Sure, HiMERU doesn’t mind. Leaving things as they are must be frustrating, so let’s give it another shot ♪

Kohaku: Thank you kindly. Alright, I’ll go search once again from the top.

Niki: Hmm. Well, both Rinne-kun and Kohaku-chan left, so should we tidy up and disperse?

How rare of Rinne-kun to say such decent stuff, though~. When he’s usually nothing but a tyrant.

HiMERU: --…......

Niki: Hmm? So this time HiMERU-kun’s the one lost in thought, huh.

He~y, HiMERU-ku~n?

HiMERU: (There was a feeling of discomfort within Amagi’s attitude, akin to a falsehood. It felt like he was putting on an act…)

(It was so slight that Oukawa and Shiina probably didn’t notice.)

(This must be what people call “a liar knows a liar”. That’s how HiMERU could sense it.)

(Thinking it over, the conclusion HiMERU arrives at is--)

Aah… Of course, so that’s how it is. Fufufu ♪

Niki: This time he talked to himself and burst into laughter!? That’s scary!

He~y, HiMERU-ku~n. Please stop ignoring me and snap out of it~.

HiMERU: Aah, my apologies. HiMERU was lost in reverie. But it’s no good to “be so lost in thought that one forgets their surroundings”.

Niki: What’s so interesting?

HiMERU: --You see,...

--No, HiMERU will hold off on that for now. It wouldn’t be elegant to tell you. Just for today, HiMERU will accommodate that man ♪

Niki: Eh. What the hell!? When you put it like that, it just makes me all the more curious~!?

Location: Café Area

- A few days later -

Kohaku: I finally found a good job, and here I wanted to announce it all flashily like as a proper debut--

But when I went to the café where we usually meet up, it was their closin’ day…

So I came here instead, but… Is HiMERU-han even around?

Rinne: Hell yeah~! Niki, that building you’ve got there is now the property of Rinne-kun~! Hand over all your money~!

Niki: UwaaAAAH!? N-no wayyy~! I developed that building with all my love and care~!

HiMERU: --You made a bad move last turn. If you keep this up, you’ll be bankrupt soon, Shiina. Which is why HiMERU is going to take that credit he lent you back now.

Niki: Are you a demon!? HiMERU-kun, what color is your blooood~!?*

Rinne: Kyahahaha ☆ Mo~ney, mo~ney ♪

Kohaku: ...Guess there’s no need to look for him.

And they’re gamblin’ again. Seriously, what’s the world comin’ to if that’s what idols act like…

They oughta call it a hell filled with nothin’ but money grubbers instead.

Well, just lookin’ at this wild party from the outside won’t get me anywhere. I’m not feelin’ up for it really, but I guess I’ll call out to ‘em.

Y’all seem to be havin’ a blast. Makin’ an unbearable fuss about it, too.

Rinne: Ooh, Kohaku-chan. You made it ♪ Come and play with us!

Kohaku: Nah, I’m good. Hmm, I overheard some talk about money earlier, so I figured y’all were gamblin’, but you’re just playin’ that board game you brought the other day.

HiMERU: --Yes. Amagi kept pestering us about it, so we finally gave in today.

If the game involved betting real money, HiMERU wouldn’t consent to it, though.

Rinne: And there you have it! Well, as far as I’m concerned it’d have been more fun with real money.

But since we’re not doin’ that, Kohaku-chan can feel at ease and join in, too.

Kohaku: I told you I’m not gonna.

At any rate, I think it ain’t right for a buncha guys who are supposedly idols to be gettin’ all hyped playin’ a dubious board game like that.

It’s far-off from the image of idols I’ve gotten from lookin’ at ‘em online.

There’s probably no need to worry about it since this place is off-limits to the general public, but don’t you think the others in this trade are gonna look down on y’all for this?

Rinne: Gyahahaha ☆ Serious as ever. But you can dump that worn-out image you have of idols right into the trash can.

Bein’ so caught up in your common sense just makes you a commoner! How boring.

Niki: Letting Rinne-kun preach to you about morals isn’t worth the trouble, Kohaku-chan. It’ll just make you hungry.

By the way, what’re you doing here? Do you have business with us?

Kohaku: Ah, right! I got so caught up in this idiotic spectacle that it slipped my mind.

Well, I only really have business with HiMERU-han over there.

HiMERU: --With HiMERU? What could this be about?

Kohaku: It’s about the contest from the other day, I found a job for it. See, I can do it if I try. Ko ko ko ♪

HiMERU: --Hmm. That’s great news.

Rinne: Sweet! Hey, what kinda job is it? I wanna have a look-see~

Kohaku: Ah, if I let Rinne-han see, it’ll put me at a disadvantage! Get lost! Shoo, shoo!

Rinne: Don’t be so cold~. Rinne-kun and Kohaku-chan are buddies, right? And there’s also merits in showin’ it to me!

You can put pressure on me that way! Showin’ your opponent your hand to make ‘em tremble in fear is a valid measure in gamblin’!

So lemme see~☆

Niki: Uwah~, I can’t believe you’d break out the smooth talk for something like this. Actually, it’s kinda impressive.

Rinne: Niki-ku~n. Stand at attention right there and keep that mouth shut, else you’ll probably die ♪

Niki: U-umm~…? Why are you posing like a martial artist? L-let’s keep this peaceful, okay, Rinne-kun?

Ah, that smile is real scary...!?

Kohaku: ...Aah, geez. You’re so noisy. I get it! I get it already! I found the job first, so I guess it’s fine to show it to Rinne-han and Niki-han too.

Be grateful that I’m such a generous guy~♪

HiMERU: --My, my. Well, one could say that knowing when to give in is a sign of maturity.

--In any case, let’s get to the main topic. What kind of job did you find, Oukawa?

Kohaku: Right. Gimme a second, I bookmarked the HoldHands page for it.

Ummm? Aah, it’s this one, the one right there!

HiMERU: --Let’s see here…

Hmm…? This is…

Kohaku: ? What, is there a problem with it?

Rinne: Which one is it? ...Hm~?

Niki: Aah… That one, huh~… (shaking his head in disapproval)

Kohaku: Hey, what. Don’t gang up on me with those dicey reactions!

-----------------------

* Niki is quoting Rei/Lei/Ray from Hokuto no Ken/Fist of the North Star here.

Location: Resting Area

Kohaku: Hoo~oh. “Work” is one simple word, but there are all kinds of work, aren’t there…

It’s a bit late for me to say this, but should I have really wagered that stupid bet? HiMERU-han…

HiMERU: -- Seeing how excited Amagi was about this, HiMERU thinks that refusing the gamble would have just led to more trouble.

Kohaku: I guess you’re right. The way he was actin’ back then, I can only imagine the tantrum he’d have thrown if I’d refused.

After that, he suddenly said somethin’ about it bein’ a team battle, we decided that I’m on a team with HiMERU-han while he’s on a team with Niki-han, and we left to go look for a job.

Which leads us to now, where we’re lookin’ at HoldHands…

Now that I’m in my right mind again, I feel somewhat sorry for draggin’ HiMERU-han and Niki-han into somethin’ as idiotic as this.

HiMERU: -- We’re past the point of no return anyhow, so there’s no use fretting over it now, Oukawa.

Besides. HiMERU is sure that this is going to be fun in it’s own way, so there’s no need to worry.

Kohaku: True enough. But earlier, you said you’d hesitate to approve of a gamble like this, right?

HiMERU: Fufu. HiMERU still hasn’t approved of it, even now. But HiMERU feels like it might be fun to help Oukawa in facing his first job.

-- Also, after what happened the other day, it’s like everyone has forsaken us. So it’s probably a good plan to work as idols for as long as we still can.

Kohaku: Aah. Now that you say it, you’re right. It’s a cold, hard world out there. Well, we’re really just reapin’ what we’ve sown.

HiMERU: And Amagi’s words from back then hit “me” pretty hard…

Nevermind, this is unrelated.

Kohaku: What’cha suddenly mumblin’ about? HiMERU-han’s quite the odd fellow at times, huh.

Well, no matter. Since you seem to be havin’ fun, I guess I’ll depend on you for a little bit.

At any rate, this HoldHands is quite useful. You can look at all the information on job offers at once, and the search function is a great help.

Ah, this job seems like it’d be a good fit for Crazy:B, too.

HiMERU: Which one? -- Aah, indeed, that one seems like it’d be no problem for us.

Kohaku: Hrm~m… Generally, I’d just call dibs on all the jobs I selected, simply wait for their response, and that’d be the end of it….

But since the job has to be better than whatever Rinne-han’s pickin’ out, I’m at a loss for which one to choose.

No matter which one I go for, I feel like I might win. But I also feel like there’s a chance I’ll lose, regardless of which one I pick. This is difficult.

HiMERU-han’s been active as a solo act before, and you’ve been in the industry longer than I have. Can you show me how I can tell which job’s gonna be good, or somethin’?

People’s experiences make the best reference book, right ♪ And as an ironclad rule, individual people’s reviews on social media are better than online advertisements.

HiMERU: --Hrm~m… HiMERU’s history as a performer is long, but HiMERU hasn’t really looked for his own jobs before.

And he never assigned much importance to the “quality” of a job. In order to gain all kinds of experiences, HiMERU tried just about anything once.

Kohaku: I see… Sounds tough. Guess that’s how the cookie crumbles. But if HiMERU-han can’t serve as a reference, I don’t know where to go from here…

HiMERU: -- Additionally, HiMERU can’t be the one to choose the job this time. Because if he did, even if you won the contest you’d still have lost against Amagi.

Kohaku: ? What’cha mean by that?

HiMERU: -- Amagi might be frivolous, but HiMERU believes that he still speaks the truth in his own way.

Well, it’s not like HiMERU completely understands everything about him…

But no matter how many beautiful words you line up, when it comes down to it, this world is a struggle against one another. And the same rings true for the idol industry.

To avoid ending up on the side that gets squeezed dry, it’s necessary to use your head and make your own choices.

And that is probably that man’s field of expertise.

...Whoops, that statement might be slightly misleading. No matter what you do, please never become someone like Amagi, Oukawa.

It would cause a lot of people anxiety if you did, and it’d be a nuisance for HiMERU as well. -- In any case, all you need is “to make your own choices”.

-- To get back to what you were talking about earlier, Oukawa. The question of whether to believe an advertisement or a review is the same issue. Choosing one over the other is no easy feat.

However, whether you steal or are stolen from, whether you avoid conflict or fight, if the way you live is something you not only thought about briefly but actually chose for yourself, then you’ll be able to live with the choice you’ve made.

Kohaku: I see~. I guess that means there’s no point to the contest unless I search for the job myself.

HiMERU: -- Correct.

Kohaku: But that was one deeply meaningful speech. You’re mighty persuasive. Sounded like you were talkin’ from experience?

HiMERU: -- It was just a generalization ♪

Kohaku: I see, then I’ll leave it at that.

Well then, guess I’d better keep my eyes glued to the HoldHands display and see if I can’t find a good job for us.

It’d be mighty vexing to let that idiot make a monkey of me any more than he’s already done, so I’m gonna go all out for once.

Location: Café “Cinnamon”

Rinne: Whazzu~p! The great Rinne-sama has come all the way over here to you loners to lend you a helpin’ hand ☆

Oh wowowow, no need to sob tears of gratitude.

I can’t leave kids who are sittin’ by themselves in the corner of the classroom alone, it’s in my nature. Hm~m, I’m such a class rep ♪

And as such, I’m gonna go right ahead and confiscate Kohaku-chan’s computer~☆ You shouldn’t bring that kind of thing to school!

Kohaku: Ugyaah!? What’cha doin’, you utter moron! Don’t lean on my head! An' give back my laptop at once!

Rinne: Ooh, what a filthy mouth you’ve got on you. It’s what you get for being glued to your computer screen 24/7! I don’t recall havin’ raised you to be like this!

Kohaku: And I don’t recall bein’ raised by you at all. You oughta re-enrol in life.

Rinne: Kyahaha ☆ You’re as lively as ever, Kohaku-chan ♪ Best for kids to be full of energy like that!

Kohaku: Don’t treat me like a kid every chance you get, it’s a real pisser.

HiMERU: Fufu. How nice to see you two on good terms.

Kohaku: What were you lookin’ at that gave you that idea. Your eyes can’t possibly be that bad.

Rinne: Nevermind all that. Hey Kohaku-chan, is your head just for decoration or what?

Kohaku: What’s this all outta nowhere. Didja come over here just to pick a fight with me?

How about instead of losin’ yer heart on this pointless endeavour, you go back over there and play yer li'l board game with Niki-han?

Rinne: I’m sorry to say that Niki gave me the brush-off. Who does he think he is, rejectin’ me?

HiMERU: -- HiMERU thinks that was a rather wise decision on his part.

Rinne: Hey, you’re so mean. Whatever, I’ll just kick Niki’s ass for that later…

Anyway, this is about you, Kohaku-chan. I overheard what you were talkin’ about earlier.

Kohaku: What, didja come here to say some sentimental nonsense, too?

Rinne: No~pe? Actually, I think you had a point. Only a third-rate gambler regrets the number on a dice they bet on and gets all down in the dumps about it.

Way healthier to just think about your next move instead.

But y’know. That only applies when you were the one who rolled the dice in the first place.

If you renounce your ability to think and resign yourself to the status quo, you’re not even a third-rate gambler -- You’re just a doll then, nothin’ more.

Forget about that newcomer-whatever thingie, someone like that couldn’t even get any job in the first place!

Kohaku: Thanks for the sermon. Are you tryin’ to tell me I’m just a doll?

Rinne: Just a warnin’. ‘Cause from what I heard, it’s an adults’ duty to correct childrens’ mistakes.

Kohaku: ……..

I admit that I’ve never taken on a job before, yes. And as long as that stands, nothin’ I’ll say is gonna sound persuasive to you.

Very well. Since you insist, I’m gonna find a job for Crazy:B.

That way I can verify myself if what people say ‘bout the job hunt is true. You’ve got no complaints about that, I assume.

Rinne: Oh? Awesome, that’s the spirit! Just how I like it ♪

HiMERU: Amagi, please wait.

Rinne: Aahn? What’s up?

HiMERU: -- Won’t there be trouble if we take on a job without running it by the agency first? HiMERU thought that’s how it is for us.

Rinne: Don’t sweat the small stuff. We should be able to talk that out with the agency later! Don’t we have enough of a track record to allow for those kinda negotiations? It’ll work itself out.

It’s a critical moment to see if our little Kohaku-chan can net us a job, after all.

...Hmm? Speakin’ of which, doesn’t it... -- Yeah, it feels like a gamblin’ parlor in here!

Kyahahaha ☆ Am I right, am I right!? Alriiight! Let’s bet on whether or not Kohaku-chan is gonna be able to get a job for us!

Kohaku: Hah? How idiotic…

HiMERU: -- Amagi… To think that you’d turn this into a gamble… Even HiMERU is disgusted.

Niki: Rinne-kun, I guess the bet is off, huh~?

Sorry for the wait~. HiMERU-kun and Kohaku-chan, here’s your coffee and hiyashi-ame*.

Rinne: Ah! Why didn’t you bring me a drink!? Shouldn’t it be common sense for you to bring me my drink first!?

Niki: Owww! Owowowow! Don’t put me in a headlock! It’s not like you ordered anything in the first place, right, Rinne-kun!?

Rinne: Whether I ordered a drink or not, you shoulda brought me one either way! Oraora~♪

Niki: Please don’t ask the impossible of me~! GyaAH!? Owowow!? It seriously hurts!

Rinne: This is my passionate hug of love! Except it’s limited to your noggin only! Isn’t your head just spinnin’ from happiness, Niki? Revel in it some more, you little shit~♪

Niki: My head is spinning for other reasons, though~! Cut it out for real, Rinne-kun…

Ah, now I’m seeing stars!? Isn’t this real bad!?

HiMERU: -- That’s enough, Amagi. Well, HiMERU thinks it’s not a good idea to decrease the number of members in our unit at this point…

Rinne: Aahn? ...Hmm, guess you’re right.

Niki: Puhah! I almost crossed the River Styx just now…

HiMERU: By the way, Shiina, what makes you think Amagi’s gamble won’t come into existence?

....That said, HiMERU also hesitates to approve of that kind of gamble.

Niki: Hmm? Ah~, no. That’s not what I meant by that~?

I was just saying, since you can easily get a job just by opening HoldHands and scrolling through it for a minute, it won’t make much of a wager...

Kohaku: ...Now that you say it, you’re right. What gives, Rinne-han, were you tryna let me win?

Rinne: Gyahahaha ☆ As if I’d ever make such a boring bet! Equal terms is what makes a gamble interestin’!

That’s right! As you say, as things stand right now, Kohaku-chan’s got the advantage. That’s why we’ll give him a “handicap”!

HiMERU: A “handicap”...?

Rinne: Y’know how racehorses get weights strapped to their backs before they enter a race as a handicap? Somethin’ like that!

And Kohaku-chan’s handicap is namely -- me! Go ahead and applaud~☆

Kohaku: You’re leavin’ out somethin’ here. After all, you’re my handicap every day already. That’s how much of a nuisance you are.

Rinne: Heyheyhey, don’t be so cold. Rinne-kun’s gonna cry, y’know?

Well, in any case. I’ll go out and try to find a job as well. It’s a match between me and Kohaku-chan to see who can get the better job!

I bet I can find the best job! And I’m sure you’re bettin’ on yourself too, Kohaku-chan.

And of course, there’s gonna be a penalty game² for the loser ♪

----------------------------------

* Hiyashi-ame is a cold, refreshing beverage from the Kansai area Kohaku hails from. It’s made of dissolved malt syrup, water and ginger and then chilled.

² Penalty Game

Location: Café “Cinnamon”

Rinne: Come on~... Hey, come on already~. Let’s do it, Niki~.

Niki: Ah, you decided on your order? ...One coffee, is it? Coming right up~♪

Welcome~♪

Rinne: Come ooon~. Don’t ignore me. Hey~, heeey~.

Niki: Gee~z. What did you suddenly show up here for, Rinne-kun. With Kohaku-chan and HiMERU-kun in tow, no less.

...Can’t you tell what I’m doing right now?

Rinne: Wastin’ your youth!

Niki: How is that your takeaway here!? No matter how you look at it, I’m working part-time at this café!

Rinne: Kyahaha ☆ And I’m sayin’ that’s a total waste, alright? The only thing that’s equally distributed to all people on earth is “time” after all!

Don’t spend it all on somethin’ like labor, it’s wasteful.

Anyhoo. How about you and I do somethin’ more productive instead ♪ Just bet all your chips (time) on me. You’re not gonna make a loss!

Niki: I wish you’d realize just how much every bit of time I’ve spent with you so far has been a loss on my part already.

So? I’ll ask just in case, but what is it that you say you wanna do, Rinne-kun?

Rinne: Clean your eyes and have a look-see! It’s a “property-trading board game”!

There’s no better game to build up the strength needed to survive the battlefield known as capitalism, right! And asset management is just another kinda gamble.

Niki: So that huge box you’re carrying has Mono*oly in it? Where’d you get that, anyway.

Rinne: I hit the jackpot at the pachinko parlor*. Made a total killin’. Even now I can’t stop laughin’ about it! Kyahahahaha ☆

I found that game among the prizes². Seemed interestin’, so I went and exchanged for it. Rather than workin’ your ass off, let’s do this instead! Niki-kun, play with me~♪

Niki: Eeh? But I don’t wanna~.

That game is way more of a waste of time than work is. And it’ll just make me hungry. My body is bad enough at absorbing nutrition as it stands, so don’t steal away any more of it.

Also, playing games isn’t productive at all.

Rinne: Fufun ♪ You’re so naive. The productivity factor is added in by playin’ with real money! The loser will be bled dry, and become the victors’ slave ‘til death ☆

And I’m on a roll today! So prepare yourself, ‘cause I’ll chew you up and spit you out!

Niki: What kind of reasoning is that!? Why do I gotta be your golden goose and get fried in a pan!?³

Your tyranny has gone too far, Rinne-kun. Well, I do like a good poultry dish~, but I sincerely refuse to become an ingredient for one.

Rinne: You goddamn idiot, divine providence itself is tyranny.

That said, well, have a seat. Come on, let’s roll the dice and see who’s battin' first!

Niki: Do you ever listen to people!? What makes you think I agreed to participate in this~! Man, I’ve had enough of this guy…

Can’t you just play the game with Kohaku-chan and HiMERU-kun? ...Huh, wait. Where did they go…?

Ah! You two are so unfair! Sitting all the way over there and feigning ignorance!

Rinne: Come on, Niki. Let’s get started~♪

Niki: I told you I’m not gonna play with you~!

Kohaku: ………..

One way or another, those two seem to be havin’ a whale of a time over there. Glad to see ‘em havin’ fun.

But I had the right idea when I sat over here with HiMERU-han ‘cause I wanted to avoid bein’ thought of as Rinne-han's company at any cost. And I can use my laptop in peace over here, too--

HiMERU: ...Fufu.

Kohaku: ...HiMERU-han, you’re havin’ a mighty chuckle at your phone. Didja happen to find something funny on there?

HiMERU: --Aah, no. HiMERU was merely perusing the job vacancy information on HoldHands.

Kohaku: HoldHands…? Really, why? Do they have any funny job offers?

What about? Last I checked, the only bizarre offer on there was an “archaeological excavation”...

HiMERU: They have a job offering for that? How very interesting ♪

But off the mark. HiMERU was actually looking at the jobs for newcomers.

--Have a look. The job offers are divided into categories based on their requirements, right?

Among those, the jobs that allow newcomers to apply get taken up quickly by some cute eager beavers. HiMERU just found that charming.

They’re probably recklessly taking on any jobs they can, with all their might.

Kohaku: Hmm?

HiMERU: --You’re making an expression as if you don’t quite understand, Oukawa?

Kohaku: I understand what you’re lookin’ at all keenly, but I don’t see how that is charmin’ in any way?

‘Cause, you know. They’re just takin’ whatever jobs they have the qualifications for, right?

Nothin’ charmin’ about it.

HiMERU: …You may be right, but there are a lot of thoughts and actions, joyful and frustrating feelings all encompassed within--

HiMERU is sure of the existence of such drama. And it exists in proportion for each and every single newcomer.

--And that’s why, when HiMERU sees that kind of “earnesty” in people, he finds it charming.

Kohaku: …? You’re an unexpectedly sentimental one, ain'tcha, HiMERU-han?

Well, ya made it sound like it’s all “other people's affairs” to you, though.

HiMERU: --Oh? That’s how it came off to you?

Kohaku: Well, whatever. At any rate, this is all completely beyond me. If there’s work, go for it, and if you didn’t get the job, just go lookin’ for another. That’s how I see it.

There’s no feelings behind the hirin’ process. Do the people out there really rejoice and worry over every little thing like that? That’s just perplexin’ to me.

HiMERU: ………..(smiling)

-------------------------------

* For anyone interested, he was playing a machine that employs the kakuhen system, which is a payout system resulting in an increase of jackpot odds once a certain jackpot has been hit. This way, it is possible to chain a number of jackpots in a row until the fever mode ends. If you want to learn more about pachinko, the Wikipedia article on it is pretty informative.

² In Japan, gambling is illegal. Pachinko parlors therefore only allow you to exchange pachinko balls into prizes, which range from small stuff like lighters to bicycles and electronics, and the “special prizes” which are little gold colored statues in boxes that you can then exchange at a separate store outside the parlor for money. It’s a legal loophole.

³ The original joke has layers, so I’ll explain. Niki uses the expression “a duck comes along carrying a welsh onion on it’s back”, shortened to “duck onion” in JP, which means “here comes a sucker just begging to be parted from his money”. He says that’s how Rinne treats him, and adds that he doesn’t get why he has to be thrown into a hot pot because of that, and in his next line says he likes hot pot with duck in it, though.

Location: Garden Space East

- Another day, in the early morning the day of Yumenosaki Academy’s graduation ceremony -

Tsumugi: Zzz...♪

Natsume: He~Y… Wake up MojasuKE, the graduation ceremony is going to start soON.

Physically, the diploma may be nothing but a scrap of papER, but if you don’t go and accept it in person you won’t feel the closure in your heaRT.

Tsumugi: Mmh… Please let me sleep for five minutes longer~, mother ♪

Natsume: I am not your mothER. ...SheeSH, you really make yourself look stupid up until the very eND. That’s very like you thouGH, SenpAI.

Sora: Sniff… sob, uu~?

Natsume: SoRA. It’s fine for you to cry all you want todAY, but this guy is quite the worrywaRT… So make sure to send him off with a smile on your faCE, otherwise this Four-eyes might turn into a wandering ghoST.

Sora: Sniiiff! Uu~... You’re making it sound like Senpai died, but he’s just graduating normally, right?

Natsume: YeAH. He’s only graduatiNG. And we formally joined his agenCY, which means we’ll be able to keep performing together as Switch.

We merely won’t be seeing this gloomy hairball on school grounds any longER.

He said he won’t cut his hair because it’s part of a Buddhist prayER, thouGH.

We should have already dispelled anything that could turn into a cause for regrET, so how come he still stubbornly refuses to get a haircUT?

Sora: HaHa~♪ Sora doesn’t know that, but maybe the part about it being a Buddhist prayer is just an excuse? Maybe he actually just likes the hairstyle, and that’s why he doesn’t want to change it… or something?

Natsume: If that’s the caSE, there’s no cure for him being unfashionabLE, even in deaTH. The only explanation is that he never developed a sense of style while he was in his mothers’ woMB.

Sora: HiHi~♪ Shisho~ likes Senpai’s hair a lot, though! That’s the “color” you give off!

If you really hated it, you’d act indifferent towards it~, but since you keep pointing it out~..?

Natsume: Sometimes this kid is so perceptive that it’s almost scaRY.

Sora: ...Does Shisho~ hate Sora for that?

Natsume: Hm~M, who knoWS? I might hate crybabiES, thouGH?

Sora: Wawah, then Sora will stop crying!

Look, look! Sora’s smiling...☆

Natsume: MhM. That’s the Sora we love best...♪

Tsumugi: ….! ……!?

Sora: Shisho~? Senpai is writhing in agony! Why are you covering Senpai’s nose and mouth with the palm of your hand? People probably can’t breathe like that~?

Natsume: In order to wake someone uP, stopping their breathing is the most effective methOD.

On the off-chance that he doesn’t wake up from thIS… Senpai will fall into an eternal slumbER, and gets to sleep for as long as he wanTS, until he’s sick of IT. This wAY, no one gets harmED, so it’s the best solutiON, rigHT?

Sora: Nonono? If he dies it’s probably all over for him~!?

Natsume: YeP. There may be a reset button for liFE, but you can’t keep “going back to start again from zero” over and ovER.

Tsumugi: ...Bwah!?

Sora: Ah, he really woke up~♪ Incredible, Shisho~ can really solve any problem, huh~?

Natsume: FufUN. There’s nothing I cannot dO. I may not be NapoleON, but I am a magiciAN ♪

Tsumugi: Gasp! Aah, delicious oxygen!

W-w-w-why did you try to kill me, Natsume-kun!? I trusted you…!

Natsume: You didn’t dIE, thouGH. But if you’d like to not only graduate from high schoOL, but from your life as well todAY, I don’t miND. I’ll perform the last rites for your meaningless life right here and nOW.

Tsumugi: I-it’s not meaningless, okay! Why are you saying such terrible things, I thought we finally understand each other and are once again as close as we used to be!

Natsume: HmM. Are you sure you’re fine with that being your goAL; returning to how things were in the paST? If you’re gonna act like an arrogant seniOR, why not aim higher than thAT?

Show me your cool siDE, “Tsumugi-nii-san” ♪

Tsumugi: ...Pff, ahahahaha ☆

Natsume: ...What’s so funNY? How unpleasaNT. Have you finally lost your miND?

Tsumugi: Ah, no, I’m sorry… You may not remember it, but long, loong ago you once said the same thing, right?

I just found it amusing because I happened to be dreaming of that time just a moment ago. Natsume-kun, have you gained the ability to magically peek inside my dreams now?

Natsume: Not into the ones you see while you sleep at nigHT, but as for the dreams you create during the daytiME, I can more or less see thEM, yeAH.

...LoOK, I don’t actually caRE, but snap out of that drowsiness so we can go to the auditorium alreaDY, alrigHT~? If you keep dawdliNG, I’ll leave you behiND, got IT?

Tsumugi: Aah, please wait! I need to put on my glasses, otherwise I won’t be able to see in front of me and I’ll be too scared to walk! Also, my hair will always be unkempt no matter how much I struggle with it!*

Natsume: Then get a haircUT, seriousLY. I was talking about that with Sora earliER, actualLY. How come you keep clinging to that same old hairstyle no matter whAT?

Tsumugi: Eh~? I feel like I keep telling you the same thing in response to that, but the truth is kind of embarrassing, so I’ll tell you later… Well, eventually!

Isn’t it fine the way it is, though? Sora-kun even complimented my hair, telling me it looks like a birds’ nest~♪

Thanks to this nest, the blue bird can keep on living...♪

Location: Starry Sky

- Within the dream, or possibly a memory -

Tsumugi: --Natsume-chan, why aren’t you taking this seriously! Don’t you want to become an idol?

You have to give it your all! Otherwise you’re completely wasting your cuteness, like pearls before swine!

Natsume: Hey, what does that mean? Are you saying you’re sooo clever just because you know difficult words?

Tsumugi: Uu~! That’s not what I mean, I just think it’s a waste…!

I admire you, Natsume-chan. I want to become like you, someone who’s loved by everyone.

Natsume: Hmph, it’s only natural that everyone loves Natsume, though? ‘Cause Natsume is “special”, so Natsume automatically attracts attention!

So you see, the reason why Mommy enrolled Natsume in this school isn’t because she doesn’t love Natsume…

It’s because she wants to put Natsume’s “specialness” to good use and hone it further.

Will Mommy be satisfied if Natsume becomes an idol? Will she praise Natsume and hug Natsume tightly?

If so, then Natsume will become an idol! An idol who’s beloved by everyone!

Tsumugi: Aah, I get it. I am aiming to become an idol for the very same reason.

Natsume: ...You too, Tsumugi-nii-san?

Tsumugi: Yes! We’re in the same boat, chasing the same dream! That’s why you won’t be lonely, because I’ll always be by your side, Natsume-chan!

Natsume: ...Like we’re bound by the red string of fate?

Tsumugi: Huh? That’s right, it’s the same color as Natsume-chan’s hair! This is the red string!

Then, I’ll grow my hair out like Natsume-chan’s! Even if Natsume-chan’s string gets torn, it’s all going to be okay because I can just tie it together with mine!

See, if we weave** our hair together like this and tie it together… Done! Now there’s no need to worry! I promise I will never cut this string even if I die!

Natsume: Uwah~? It’s hard to walk when our hair is all entangled like this~, you’re sooo bad at cheering people up! You’re a hopeless case, Nii-san! You should act more cool, like a prince in a fairytale!

Tsumugi: That’s a lot to ask of me, umm..? This is the best I can do right now, though~?

I’m sorry that I’m such a pathetic Nii-san… I’m begging you, please don’t cry. Natsume-chan is the cutest when she smiles.

Smile, lift your head, get up and do your best in lots of lessons… And one day, we’ll fulfill our dream. Let’s become idols together.

Let’s become happy together, you and me.

--------------

* When Natsume says “dawdling”, he uses a word that also refers to unkempt hair, prompting Tsumugi to misunderstand him.

** “tsumugu”, the verb that Tsumugi’s name is probably based on.

Location: Wonder Game Stage

Ibara: Fufu. In retrospect it’s kind of a funny story... But originally, I had a more violent strategy in mind than this, you see.

By making use of this “Wonder Game”, I was going to be more bold in seizing the initiative regarding that new agency.

Natsume: ...In other worDS?

Ibara: Natsume-kun. I was going to use you for my convenience, in every sense of the word.

I asked His Excellence and His Highness about the tragedy you experienced as a member of the “Five Oddballs”, and I've gotten a good grasp of what happened.

Naturally, you must harbor a grudge against fine, who hurt the people dearest to you.

It’s what I deduced from the conversations I had with His Excellence and His Highness, and I verified it myself.

Hatred clouds people’s judgment. Which means that if you go head-to-head against us, who have former fine members in our ranks, the chances of you behaving recklessly is high.

Natsume: ………..

Ibara: I was going to make you lose yourself in your anger. So I sneakily hid your costume, made you remember the tragedy you experienced in the past by bringing it up in casual conversation, and so on…

And in order to corner you even further, I asked His Eminence to stir the pot a little and employed a number of other schemes as well.

Natsume: ....So all of that was part of your plAN, Ibara-kUN.

Ibara: Allow me to answer that with a “yes”. Well, judging from the onstage chatter I overheard, you were way more preoccupied worrying about His Majesty’s career path.

Due to that, among other things… You are currently not in your top form, so to speak. Taking down an opponent who is in a state of confusion would be an easy feat, in fact, it wouldn’t even pose the slightest challenge.

His Eminence asking you to participate in a match-fixing would have been the last straw for you…

Working yourself into a frenzy, you would then come challenge Eden, since we have former fine members in our ranks.

However. There is no way a reckless daredevil with no strategy or anything of the sort could defeat Eden. At this final performance, we were going to attain a magnificent victory over you.

Indeed, we planned to beat you black and blue.

It would have at least relieved some of the humiliation we experienced during “SS”, and once we’d have established our superiority… It would have been even easier to make His Majesty submit to us.

Of course, we need him to perform brilliantly at the new agency from now on.

Which means that we needed Switch to lose in a way that wouldn’t tarnish His Majesty’s good name in the least.

So the cause of your loss would have been the reckless actions of the “Oddball”, Sakasaki Natsume.

It goes without saying that the crowd would boo us out if the villains won, so we planned to gloriously transform into “Alice” at the last moment during this performance.

All while making a face as if we had no other choice, and, well, that would’ve been a wrap ♪

Natsume: ...Guess you were targeting me even more than I thougHT.

Ibara: Indeed. For us at Eden, with the former fine members among us…

It’d be best if the “Five Oddballs” remained filthy villains deserving of scorn in the eyes of people, regardless of whether this reflects reality or not.

We would have publicly humiliated Natsume-kun by showing everyone his disgraceful behaviour and all the trouble he causes those around him… And it’d have been all over for you.

Everyone is swept up in optimistically making the idol industry a livelier place, when you, one of the “Five Oddballs”, would suddenly be exposed to act in an unsightly manner.

Surely, everyone would say the same thing. That the “Five Oddballs” are no good after all.

That only terrible things of no value get buried and abandoned in the past, and that they can only look forward to the new strength that fine and Eden will bring in the future.

Despite everyone talking about it as if it was in the distant past, the subjugation of the “Five Oddballs” only happened about a year ago.

In fact, it still remains vividly in the hearts of people, especially those with ties to the industry.

That’s why it’d be an easy feat to sway their hearts to put their faith in us, the people who shoulder the responsibility of the new era.

You were going to be the offering we’d have sacrificed for the sake of our brightly shining future.

Natsume: ….Are you telling me you were going to defile the “Five Oddballs” even furthER, as though you were kicking a corpSE?

Ibara: Why, you’re not a corpse, are you? If the results of my investigation aren’t mistaken, there is a survivor among the “Five Oddballs”!

I may have been barking up the wrong tree, but I thought I’d be doing you, the cherished child they protected until the end, a favor by coming to kill you off!

And with that, fine’s war would have finally been over. Without any lingering regret left, His Excellence, His Eminence, His Highness and His Majesty would finally be able to move onwards, to a new battlefield.

One of the winning conditions of a war is to “annihilate the enemy completely”. I love war, which is why I thought I’d join the battle, even if I was dispatched too late.

….But in the end, I didn’t get to have any fun whatsoever. His Excellence got mad at me, telling me “Our war is long over”.

It didn’t look like that to me from an outsider’s perspective, but it must be the case for everyone involved.

My gravest error was being unable to grasp the complicated, mysterious emotions and states of mind of these people, and misreading them.

In my folly, I tried to create smoke in a place with no fire.

From now on, I plan to stop involving myself in silly games like this and go back to focusing on my own war for my own sake. This detour ends here, the time for pleasant dreams has come to an end.

Natsume-kun. Seeing as driving you into a corner in order to defeat you was a foolish act that was not just pointless, but only served to bring His Excellence’s wrath upon me…

And since I’d like to avoid stepping on a landmine, I will abandon this plan in its entirety.

Which is why I don’t know the outcome of this match. The others are all just doing as they please now, and going all out.

They are merely innocently enjoying this last game… Before they become adults.

And I think I will do the same. I have taken everything I needed to take, so I am satisfied for the time being.

Whether I like it or not, I will have to work once I am an adult. It’s fine for me to get engrossed in this game now, while I can still remain a child, right?

Come, Alice, let’s play… Within this dream.

Until the time comes when we become adults.

“♪ ~ ♪ ~ ♪”

Natsume: …..AhaHA. He just onesidedly went on and on about his side of the stoRY, and then went right back to playiNG. He realLY, truly is a chiLD. What a cunning gUY~.

In the eND, he didn’t say a single word of apoloGY.

Tsumugi: Ahaha. Compared to honest, good kids, once you become involved with twisted, bad kids, those are the more endearing ones, huh.

Natsume: ….Are you talking about the Student Council PresideNT? Or mayBE, about ME?

Tsumugi: Who knows, I wonder which one it is ♪

More importantly, no matter how you look at it, it’s ill-advised to keep leaving Sora-kun to face off against Nagisa-kun and the others all by himself.

In fact, it might’ve been Saegusa-kun’s intention to pull the both of us away from the frontlines--

In which case, we’re in trouble. If we don’t turn things around, we’ll really lose. And if the villains win, the story won’t come to an end. Let’s work hard towards victory, as protagonists should.

Natsume: ...YeAH. You’re rigHT. Shall we turn over a new leaf and face them head-ON?

Tsumugi: Yes! Just we always do, in our style… Let’s bring this story to a happy end! A happy end is what I always wish for!

Natsume: AhaHA. “And so, the two of them lived happily ever after”, hUH.

Tsumugi: ? Sora-kun included, there’s three of us, though?

Natsume: I know that alreaDY, you dumMY~ ♪

“♪ ~ ♪ ~ ♪”

Tsumugi: “~...♪”

Location: Wonder Game Stage

Tsumugi: Umm. Excuse me for butting into this conversation as if I can’t read the mood, but do you have a moment?

Ibara: Yes, please go ahead! As expected of the “Mad Hatter” of this story! It is only natural for you to entangle yourself into other people’s conversations in absurd ways however you please, salute~☆

Tsumugi: Ahaha. It’s too bad I’m not the lead role, but, well, I guess it beats being a background character. ...In any case, there’s something I’d like to say.

Saegusa-kun. I’m speaking hypothetically here, but the agency where I’ll be working truly is tiny, with nothing to its name…

So even if you invest in it, you may end up just incurring a heavy loss.

Out of the kindness of my heart, I am warning you. I think you’d better withdraw from this deal while your wounds are still only superficial.

Ibara: Ahaha, so you’re doubting whether the diamond mines exist to begin with?

Just like in “A Little Princess”... My, just because the theme for this event was fairy tales, I went and researched way too many unnecessary things!

However! I don’t have the slightest intention to put the hard work and money I poured into this to waste.

Of course you’re correct when you say that the agency in question may be nothing but an insignificant, empty vein of ore.

...I am sure this is also the reason why, back in the student council room, that Yuzuru looked at me with such pity in his eyes.

Tsumugi: Huh, pardon? They’re still playing the music, I can’t understand you when you lower your voice like that!

Ibara: Aren’t all of you already used to talking in noisy environments like this?

Moving on! Your concerns aren’t needed, Your Majesty Tsumugi!

Tsumugi: Ah, so I’m the “Majesty” now, huh… I feel like I’m not fit to have that title, though.

Ibara: But you are a feudal lord, or at least you’ll soon be in an equivalent position… In that agency, that is. I’ve heard rumors you were ushered in on exceptional conditions.

Or rather, I confirmed those rumors myself in detail. Leaving Switch aside, this treatment is only befitting for a former fine member such as yourself.

Natsume: HeY, what’s with the “Leaving Switch asiDE”? Are you saying we’re inferior to fine?

Tsumugi: Now, now… The part about the conditions being outstanding is actually true. They’re wasted on someone like me.

This is unrelated, but my mother was very pleased with all of this, saying “My son is so amazing! The complete opposite of me!”.

Natsume: AhaHA. That must be the most rewarding part of this deal for yOU, SenpAI.

Tsumugi: It is. It feels like the heavy curse that’s been weighing on me has finally been lifted. All this time, I really just wanted for that person to smile… Even if she’s like that, she’s still my mother after all.

In any case. Since that’s the position I’m going to be in, I am well informed on the details of that agency and can say with confidence that it’s essentially just a micro-enterprise.

We are doing the best we can, but right now, our future is still shrouded in darkness.

Ibara: Is that so? I think that was only the situation until a few days ago… Now that Yumenosaki and CosPro have invested in it and guaranteed their support, that agency has finally seen the dawn of a new day, no?

Just as expected from Your Majesty! Thanks to your presence, that newly founded agency has evolved splendidly! You truly must be the “Blue Bird of Happiness” ♪

Tsumugi: Ahaha… Long ago, Eichi-kun once told me the same thing.

Ibara: Hmm. ...In any case, the days gone by have nothing to do with this. The future and the past are nothing but illusions, akin to ghosts.

To survive on the battlefield, the immediate present… The reality in front of your very eyes is the only thing that matters.

That agency has, by coincidence or otherwise, drawn attention to itself and was granted financial investment. And so it has “become” an enormous vein of gold.

We were the ones who made it one, so it goes without saying that we will dig up any gold, silver and treasures we find buried within.

So, you see, we won’t incur a heavy loss. Everything is going according to plan, and if nothing else, we’ll at the very least be able to easily make back the money we invested.

That agency stands at the very frontline of the idol industry.

I know of ways and schemes to turn this flow of events into money. I am a businessman, after all.

I pushed the issue of dealing with the deed to that troublesome plot of land that couldn’t be traded that easily over to His Eminence Eichi, who wants it…

And while I’m at it, I’m having him develop it for me, and I’ll use the building that’s planned to be constructed there for an easy profit.

To be honest, that was my primary objective. But then, the agency in question got involved in all of this, so I injected my poison into that as well. That’s what this is all about.

I am sure you already realized, but the majority of idols participating in this “Wonder Game” are inexperienced no-names who have yet to develop any distinctive characteristics whatsoever.

We at Eden are an exception to this, though.

All of you at Switch haven’t taken center stage much before, but you’re highly valued by the right people and seem to have a cult-like following… And yet, you’re by no means “orthodox idols”.

People who are out of place, or are troubled about their choice of a career path are being guided to your agency. You seem to be lacking in personnel anyway, and “Every Jack has his Jill”*, right?

I negotiated with every single one of them, and most accepted the invitation.

Also, I tracked down Your Majesty’s acquaintances, since you’ll be holding a high position in that new agency, and got them involved in the current project.

Tsumugi: Aah, the former pupils from our bankrupt idol school… And here I was wondering why so many of them just so happened to participate in this. So it wasn’t a coincidence after all.

Ibara: That much should have been obvious. They love and respect you, Your Majesty, so I am sure you will find it easy to make use of them in the new agency.

Tsumugi: About that… Well, I am grateful for it, but… I happen to be the type of person that young people don’t really listen to.

But why are you going that far for me? I mean, it’s convenient for me and all, so it’d be unreasonable of me to complain about it, but…?

Ibara: Yes. You see, since it is so convenient for you, Your Majesty won’t be able to object to or obstruct this turn of events.

Making others submit through threats isn’t efficient planning. It’s much easier to make people run after the bait you’re dangling in front of them.

Do you understand now? The one who invited all those people that hadn’t decided on a career plan yet over to your agency was me.

I’m creating a debt of gratitude for them, who will become the residents of the town on top of that gold vein.

I employed a number of other schemes as well, all to make it possible for me to manipulate them as much as I want. With regards to that agency, I turned them into my very own vanguard.

People are stone walls, people are castles.** In other words, when you have complete dominion over people, you can make them overthrow even castles. Which is why seizing the intiative regarding the new agency was an easy feat for us.

Right now, CosPro is still suffering from a bad reputation following the events of “SS”... That’s why I decided it’d be a good time to spread my roots to other agencies as well.

Of course, I plan to use my long, slender body to slither into the very depths of Yumenosaki Academy itself as well.

Natsume: How disgustiNG. Maybe I should light a fire and smoke you oUT?

In any caSE, I more or less understand the situation nOW. Senpai’s concern was completely unnecessary after aLL, since all is grist that comes to Ibara-kun’s miLL. He’s a manager with unwavering determinatiON.

Ibara: Fu fu fu. ...Well, until His Excellence pointed out that I was “hurrying too much” and so on, I didn’t notice the pitfall beneath my feet, which is why I can’t act all high and mighty now.

‘Cause you see. I never would have thought that His Eminence Eichi, an advocate for efficiency, would give his friend such a gift without any ulterior motives whatsoever. It almost turned into a massive disaster thanks to that. Aah, how frightening.

Nagisa: …..Fufun ♪

Ibara: …...Just like His Excellence, who is grinning smugly over there, said: “Surprisingly enough, Eichi-kun does act on his emotions sometimes”.

Which should go without saying since he is only human, but I get so occupied with chasing numbers that things like this can slip my mind.

The scales have fallen from my eyes. I can only hope that this shedding process made me more mature along the way.

Emotions and mental state. From now on, I want to take ambiguous factors like these into account more.

-----------

* Ibara’s original turn of phrase translates to “a mended lid for a cracked pot”, which plays more into his idea of these idols being damaged goods in a way.

** “The people are your castle, your stone walls, your moat. Protect them, and they shall protect you.” - Takeda Shingen

Location: Wonder Game Stage

Ibara: “Ahahahaha ☆ How delightful and thrilling, this thunderous applause!¹ Are you all having fun?”

“Well, too bad! The hour of dreaming ends now!”

Ibara: “I’m sure you’re all sick and tired of this already, but alas, it’s the time for the heel² to appear!”

“Cease the whispering! Straighten your backs! Stand at attention, shut your mouths and listen, salute~! Now then, everyone, it’s the “Red Queen”'s grand entrance!”

“Tonight, I will lay ruin to this stage once again with the march of my bright-red heels! Ahahahahaha...☆”

Natsume: (...WhooPS, it’s already time for the headliner to appeAR. Speaking of whiCH, Mr. Saegusa disappeared for a momeNT, but that's part of the program so it wasn’t unexpectED.)

(ActualLY, looking back at “Wonder GaME”, I didn’t get to participate in most of IT...)

(I keep getting caught off guaRD, but the others are probably already used to these thinGS.)

(Eden appointed themselves as the role of the villain of the stoRY, the “Red QueEN”, this tiME.)

(It’s a role whose primary function is to end the story that’s been repeated every day for the past two weeKS.)

(At the lives that marked the conclusion of each dAY, “Alice” always lost against the “Red QueEN”.)

(It’s a pre-established harmony in a wAY, but Eden gained those victories on their own meriTS, even without any match-fixiNG.)

(The defeated “Alices” pile up in a miserable heap of corpsES, and instead of waking up from her dream like Alice does in the original stoRY…)

(In other worDS, instead of growing up into adults like she inevitably would if she lived in realiTY, “Alice” repeats the same story in her dreams over and ovER.)

(WeLL, if “Alice” had won one of the matches in these two weeKS, it would’ve meant that “Wonder Game” would be over and left unfinishED, which would be a problEM...)

(So whatevER, I guess it’s fine like thIS.)

(I just wonder why Eden went out of their way to play the villain roLE… The role that everyone hates the moST?)

(Watching the protagonist lose over and over again must be stress-inducing for the vieweRS, but the catharsis they’ll feel once it is resolved will be that much more intenSE.)

(Or to put it another wAY; while this is only the natural progession of the stoRY, those guys will ultimately meet certain defeAT.)

(Are they sacrificing themselves in order to lead this project to succeSS…?)

(In that caSE, that’d be a commendably professional determination they’ve got theRE, but do they really have the admirable disposition necessary for thAT?)

(It’s the only logical conclusiON, but I can’t help feeling strangely uneasy about IT…)

(While it reminds me of the path my Nii-sans of the “Five Oddballs” once choSE, I just can’t picture Mr. Saegusa in particular to be the owner of such a noble soUL.)

(HowevER. The other dAY, the student council president asked “that” of ME. Just when I wondered what business the high and mighty student council president-sama would have with me that would make him walk all the way to me on his own two feET…)

(What he did was tell me about Senpai’s career plans mixed with idle taLK, and then he said thIS: “For my sake, and for the sake of the future of the idol industry, there’s something I’d like to ask of you.”)

(“During the last “Wonder Game” live, I’d like you to throw the match against Eden.”)

(In other worDS, he was suggesting a match-fixiNG. Didn’t he learn his lesson regarding those kinds of methods the hard way with Trickstar?)

(Of courSE, I have no intention of doing as I was toLD. If anythiNG, it made me think “Don’t mess with ME!”, and inspired me to want to win against Eden at any coST.)

(What the hell do you mean, “For my sake”? There’s not a single thing I want to bestow upon yOU, who crushed the “Five Oddballs” to death underfoOT! In your dreaMS, you corrupt politiciAN!)

(....Thinking thIS, I forgot myself in my anger and threw myself into my woRK, forgoing even sleep to increase our chances of winniNG.)

(But the student council president isn’t stupID. He must’ve known that I’d react like thAT. Which meaNS, he actually meant the opposite of what he saID, like a mirrOR… That’s the only logical conclusiON.)

(He actually wished for us to win against Eden.)

(And the one behind it aLL... If I had to guess from his manner of speakiNG, he was probably asked to do this by Mr. Saegusa of Eden.)

(Or rather than being askED, this was probably the result of some negotiations between thEM…)

(But even if I deduce it this fAR, our movements won’t chanGE. I can’t do the opposite of what he really wants me to do just because I hate the gUY.)

(Because in tuRN, that would mean throwing the match against EdEN. WhiCH, at least superficialLY, would make it look like I’m doing what the student council president asked me to DO.)

(And thEN, he would be smiling ear to ear when he tells me “Thanks for obeying my orders. I knew I could count on you ♪”)

(Just imagining it makes me wanna puKE! So I have no choice but to wIN… Thinking thAT, I endured the self-awareness that I was moving just like the student council president wanted me TO, and worked myself half to deaTH.)

(But what I still don’t get IS, what does Eden have to gain from all of thIS?)

(You can’t control the student council president that easiLY, which means that Mr. Saegusa must have paid a hefty compensation in order to strike this deAL.)

(But what was the point of IT? It just looks like they made us go all-out and as strong as we can BE, only to set the stage for their own defeAT...?)

(It would mean that WE, who are “Alice” and therefore the protagonisTS, defeat the villaIN, the “Red QueEN”... Following this simpLE, easy plot would end the story beautifulLY.)

(Did they try to motivate us through reverse psychology because they deemed Switch too weak to win against EdEN, who are basically the strongeST?)

(Leveling the playing field in order to avoid making the results seem suspicious to the audienCE, mayBE?)

(All in order to put a beautiful end to “Wonder Game” and make the project a success that wAY?)

(Maybe that was a part of IT, but I feel like there’s more to their motives than thIS…)

Ibara: -- It seems like you can’t dispel your misgivings, Mr. Sakasaki.

Natsume: ….! Isn’t talking on stage a breach of manners for you peopLE, -- Mr. SaeguSA?

Ibara: Fufu. Calling each other “Mr.” makes it sound like we’re complete strangers, despite being the same age. Why don’t we call each other with “-kun” instead?

Natsume: I don’t sweat details like thAT, but you won’t find me going red in the face and refusiNG. I don’t miND, Ibara-kUN ♪

Ibara: I am deeply grateful! This means that we are friends now, Natsume-kun ♪

In any case. In truth, I am about to be very busy, in fact my schedule from here-on out is filled to the brim...

But I would regret it if I were to take my leave without even saying “sorry” to you, when I had already promised that I’d apologise.

Before I leave, I wanted to convey my apologies, as well as my feelings of gratitude, for allowing me to enjoy this game of chess with you! The game will be settled in just a short moment, so would you join me after that for a talk?

Natsume: ...SuRE, I don’t miND. I also have a plethora of things I’d like to say to yOU, as well as questions I want to ask yOU.

Ibara: Splendid! Well then, let us start the final duel ♪

My, what a thrilling game this has been so far! I would have expected nothing less from Yumenosaki, where people spend all their time fighting. You are all truly strong!

I even used my strongest piece, His Eminence Eichi, but you were able to masterfully defy even that!

Natsume: Which constitutes a rule violatiON. That one’s neither a “King” nor a “QueEN”, it’s apparently an “EmperOR”... Such a shameless titLE. WeLL, whatevER.

In the eND, what kind of drawiNG, or dreAM, did you creaTE?

Ibara: My my, you still don’t get it? Shouldn’t it be obvious? It’s hard to believe those are the words of a fortune teller who supposedly sees the world from a birds'-eye view, and has complete control over it!

Natsume: I may be a fortune tellER, but I am in no way a God (an AuthOR).³ The Alice from within his story can never understand the feelings of Lewis CarroLL.

Ibara: How humble of you! This may be true for the Alice within the story… But the Alice Pleasance Liddell who existed in reality should have been able to solve this riddle⁴ to some extent, don’t you think?

Hey, Alice. Weren’t “we”⁵ seeing the same dream (reality)?

Natsume: ………...

------------------

¹ The line he uses here is apparently a reference to a well-known and memed Japanese quote from Kaibaman in Yu-Gi-Oh GX that has been changed a little. While researching this I found many JP fans who said that Ibara reminds them of Kaibaman because of his usual catchphrase (Assault! Invade! Conquer!) as well, so this reference is probably intended.

² Instead of the word “villain” he uses the word “heel” here (bad guy/villain role, for example in pro-wrestling), to make a wordplay with the heels he’s wearing two lines later. Apparently he is a pro-wrestling fan, according to Jun in the !! main story.

³ This is how it was written in the original script, with the kanji saying “God” but the hiragana behind it in brackets informing us that the word Natsume said out loud was “Author”. Ibara does the same thing a few lines later. You could say that one word is what he says, the other is what he means.

⁴ I am sorry to report that this is wordplay between “Liddell” and “Riddle”.

⁵ He uses “ore” here.

Location: Wonder Game Stage

Tsumugi: “♪ ~ ♪ ~ ♪”

“Now then, everyone! It’s time for the curtain to rise on the final chapter! Let’s start~♪”

“With this, the lengthy “Wonder Game” and this delightful tea party are finally coming to a close!”

“Please enjoy it until the very end, and may your dreams and realities be blessed ♪”

“...Why the long face, my dear guest? If you’re thirsty, maybe you’d like a sip of this tea?”

Hiyori: (whispering) Tsumugi-kun! Watch out, you're gonna spill the tea if you move around with so much force!

Tsumugi: It’s okay~, there’s no need to worry. This cup isn’t filled with tea, but a special new chemical that Natsume-kun concocted. It may look like it’s about to spill, but it won’t.

Hiyori: Ah, is that so? Like a magic trick?

Tsumugi: Yes, it’s magic ♪

“~...♪”

Hiyori: (Ahaha. That made me break out in a cold sweat. But now that I think about it, Tsumugi-kun… Even back in fine, as long as he was onstage he never made a single careless blunder.)

(In fact, he always flawlessly assisted Nagisa-kun and I with our idol activities, back when we weren't used to the stage yet.)

(Aah, how nostalgic… Oh well, this is hardly the time to get swept up in memories, right?)

(I should dance too, within this dream we created!)

(Hey! What would things have turned out like if we had held the “Wonder Game” when we were fine? Do you think history would have changed, even just a little?)

(If we had worked hard despite our lack of experience, sweated and gave it our all, and overcame our hardships…?)

(Would our friendship, would fine’s youth, have lasted even a little longer?)

(No! Thinking of “What if, back then-” is just part of growing up! Right now, we are dreaming Alices, and we sing and dance gleefully!)

(That’s good weather! No, rather than the “What ifs” of the past and future, I believe that it’s this moment right now that shines the brightest!)

“♪ ~ ♪ ~ ♪”

Nagisa: (.....Yeah. I think so too, Hiyori-kun.)

(.....You’re always so honest because you have no need to deceive yourself.)

(.....And that’s why everyone becomes so enamoured with you.)

…..Isn’t that right, Jun?

Jun: Huh? Whatcha talking about, Nagi-senpai...?

Nagisa: …..Fufu. So you haven’t perfected telepathic communication with Hiyori-kun yet, hm?

…..I win against you in that regard, because I’ve known him longer than you.

Jun: Excuse me...? I don’t really get it, but this ain’t the time for infighting, right!? Sheesh, you’re so hard to read~...

Nagisa: …..That’s because I’m not a book ♪

“~♪ ~♪”

Jun: (Huh? Was that a joke just now? Nagi-senpai is bursting with incoherent airheaded stuff on the daily, but…)

(He’s a serious guy, so he doesn’t usually make jokes on purpose. I guess wonders never cease.)

(Goddamn! With everyone cracking jokes left and right, it really feels like I’ve wandered into Wonderland on accident here~!?)

(But that’s fine by me, this place is more comfortable than expected~♪)

“~♪ ~♪”

Natsume: (HmmM. As expectED, Eden's splendor and menace onstage are on a level that no one else can keep up wiTH.)

(That isn’t to say that I took the “SS” runner-ups lightly befoRE -- But right now I’m feeling their overwhelming pressuRE.)

(If we had gone directly head-to-head with thEM, we might’ve even been trampled underfoOT, unable to fight back at aLL.)

(Maybe it was the result of them having caused so many miracles alreaDY, but it’s impressive that Baru-kun and his troupe were able to win against these monsteRS.)

(The reason for your victory was definitely not mere “luCK”. You had something I didn’t haVE… Passionate feelinGS, a brightly shining dreAM. That’s exactly why the goddess of victory smiled upon yOU.)

(You were able to become the main characteRS. Just when did I give up on thAT, I wondER.)

(I get the feeling that I still had “that” within mE, long aGO, when I was a young chiLD.)

(.....No, I need to focUS. That was cloSE, I lost myself for an instant just nOW.)

(This is what I get for neglecting my sleEP. I should have just obediently listened to Senpai’s warniNG.)

(But, you knOW. I was actually really happy when I heard about your future plans from the student council presideNT, SenpAI...)

(It made me want to do something as weLL. After aLL, clearing up the dark clouds that shroud someone’s future is the job of a fortune tellER.)

(If Senpai still feels like he wants to continue being an idOL, then the results a huge project like this “Wonder Game” will surely influence his futuRE.)

(Whether the result is good or bAD, it’ll have an impact on future idol activities one cannot disregaRD.)

(In which caSE, I’ll give you just a bit of a good result as a graduation giFT!)

(With that in miND, I gave up my sleep in favor of my efforTS. You wouldn’t sneer at thAT, would yOU?)

(.....AaH, but it’s really no goOD. My eyelids are so heaVY. I’m always like this during crucial momenTS.)

(For someone like mE, who has never earnestly put in the work befoRE, it’s impossible to achieve good results with such hasty preparatioNS.)

(Just like yOU, I’m also always too late to realize these thinGS, Nii-sAN.)

Sora: Hup ♪

Natsume: ….? SoRA, why are you clinging to me like thAT? You’re not a chiLD.

Sora: No! Sora is a cat~ nuzzle, nuzzle ♪

Meow, meow! Don’t you remember? This is Sora’s role in “Wonder Game”~, Alice’s cute pet kitten, “Kitty” ♪

Shisho~... You’ve always had your head in the clouds this time, or rather, you’ve only been worrying about Senpai. Is that why you didn’t know?

Don’t forget~, Sora is also a member of Switch!

Natsume: I-I’m sorRY, okAY? It’s not like I forgOT, of course I love yOU!

Sora: Sora knows that ♪ Sora was just sulking a little so he said something mean. Maybe Sora is still a child after all?

But! Sora is growing up little by little, can you tell? Like this, Sora could tell that Shisho~ was unsteady on his feet because he’s sleepy, and was able to support him stealthily~♪

Sora is happy about that! It’s all thanks to Shisho~ and Senpai picking Sora up and raising him firmly~! And that’s exactly why it’s time for Sora to return the favor now!

A favor for a favor, love for love! When someone smiles at you, you should return the smile, and if you take their hand in yours and sing and dance together, it’s the greatest happiness...☆

That’s what Shisho~ and Senpai taught me! Thanks to you, Sora can see the world through these eyes now!

“This is a delightful Wonderland! What’s normal for others is strange* to Sora, but when he’s together with Switch like this, he can laugh and be happy~♪”

“Mew-Mew! Let’s resound this most cheerful Music! Can you tell? This was wordplay, just like in “Alice in Wonderland”!”

“Sora is still not that good at it! But he will keep learning things like this, bit by bit! Sora lives on in happiness while being taught by Shisho~ and Senpai!”

“...Ju~st kidding ♪ Sora is a cat, so he will use actions rather than words to express that!”

“♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪~...☆”

--------------------------

* The word for “strange” that he uses here is the “wonder” in “Alice in Wonderland”, he’s doing a bit of wordplay.

Location: Wonder Game Stage

Hiyori: Yoo-hoo! Looks like everyone’s here! And what a cheerful atmosphere you’ve got going, what kind of amusing stuff were you talking about? Let us join in on the fun, too...☆

Jun: Nono, Ohii-san…

That Yumenosaki tradition of talking to each other while you’re on stage is not something you should be imitating~. It’s almost time for the cameras to roll, so pull yourself together and focus already.

Hiyori: Yup yup, of course I’m well aware of all that!

But,-- and I only realized this once I left Yumenosaki--, chit-chatting like this calms the nerves and raises body temperature while bringing smiles to everyone's faces!

That’s why I’ve come to believe that even pointless banter like this is not without its merits ♪

Jun: You’re letting your surroundings infect you too much. Or rather, since Yumenosaki is your alma mater, it feels like you’ve returned here, Ohii-san...

You won't earn any praise at CosPro for that kind of behavior, so be a good boy and behave yourself, okay~?

Hiyori: Sheesh, I know! You’re acting like such a sister-in-law*, Jun-kun! Or like a wicked stepmother!

Jun: I’m neither your sister-in-law nor your stepmother~. I am your partner.

Tsumugi: Fufu. The Eve duo sure gets along well~, makes me feel a little envious.

Hiyori-kun has always been good at socializing, but how do you manage to get on so well with people who are younger than you?

Hiyori: Hm? I think you guys get along just as well as we do, though… Speak on the same eye level, face them directly and put your heart into connecting with them! That’s good weather!

...Just act according to the ideal we created during our time in fine.

Tsumugi: Turning that ideal into reality, huh.

Hiyori: Fufun. Well, I don’t know what Eichi-kun had in mind, but “that” is what I’ve been aiming for.

Even if I live in a different place now, my dream from back then still remains untainted.

If anything, even now it only shines brighter with each passing day! Come on, behold! Gaze at me, the person who shines the most beautifully in the whole world...☆

Sora: Hiyah, this person really is blindingly radiant!?

Tsumugi: Ahaha. The most beautiful in all the world… You’re talking about the mirror from Snow White, but today is about Alice’s looking glass, right~?

Hiyori: I’m well aware! But due to Ibara’s taste for militarism, I’m wearing this austere costume that makes it hard for me to capitalize on my charm points. It’s such a waste!

That’s why I’m working heart-rendingly hard to let my “Ohii-san”-ness show through my words and conduct. Praise me to your heart’s content, if you'd please!

...And yet the person who chose these outfits is right over there, wearing a lovely costume himself.

Ibara: ……..

Hiyori: As you can see, he’s completely spoiling the look with the sour expression on his face. Hey Jun-kun, why don’t you go over there and go “coochy-coo” to make him laugh a little? It should be easier for you to approach him, since you’re the same age.

Jun: Well~... The last time you told me that I actually went ahead and tickled Ibara like you said.

But he just said “I won’t submit to torture!” or something like that, and didn’t even so much as crack a smile~.

Maybe he underwent training to withstand torture at the military facility he grew up on or something~?

Hiyori: Hmm? And here I thought that, unlike pain, itchiness and laughter are impossible to withstand no matter what kind of training you had…

Nagisa-kun told me about that before. He’s a real demon when it comes to reading, so he has nothing but unnecessary knowledge, but that he’s got in spades.

Nagisa: …..There’s no such thing as unnecessary knowledge.

…..Knowledge and information may vary in how up-to-date it is, but usefulness is not an applicable characteristic.

…..Fufu. Also, there’s no need to worry. As soon as the curtain on the stage rises, Ibara will carry out his mission properly.

Hiyori: Really? Well, he’s your partner, Nagisa-kun, so I guess if you say so?

No one can hide anything from you after all. You’ve always been like that, even back when I was your partner ♪

Nagisa: …..Even now you’re my precious comrade, my close friend, and my family, Hiyori-kun.

Tsumugi: Umm. Nagisa-kun, Hiyori-kun, is everything okay with Saegusa-kun?

Nagisa: …..Yeah. He’s fine. Or can’t you believe what I’m saying?

…..That’s troubling. Give me a moment, I’ll formulate my reasoning.

Tsumugi: Aah, there’s no need for that. I was just imagining something rather strange, that’s all…

That maybe this time Saegusa-kun’s plan is going to end in a fiasco because he was too hasty?

I am an idiot as well, and I stepped into the same pitfalls before, that’s why I can tell.

Nagisa: …..Fufu. Tsumugi-kun, you’re as kind as ever. You’ll even worry about your enemy?

Tsumugi: Well, we’re enemies in name only… CosPro’s forces are already Yumenosaki’s allies, right?

During “Wonder Game”, and even after that, we’re cooperating with each other, aren’t we? In that case, I think it’s only natural to worry about each other~?

Nagisa: …..Mhm. I remember that equation. You were the one who taught me that, long, looong ago.

…..However. You look down on our child too much.

…..If you’re insulting him intentionally, even someone like me would get angry ♪

Tsumugi: Ehh, umm..?

Ibara: …..Alright alright alriiight, analysis complete ☆

I finalized our plan! Gentlemen of Eden, please excuse the interruption, but may I ask you to gather around me for a moment?

I am greatly obliged for the trouble you had coming over here!

Nagisa: …..It’s fine, it wasn’t that far of a distance.

Hiyori: Aha, time for our usual strategy meeting!

Jun: Ibara~♪ You usually plan everything way ahead of time, but you’re cutting it awfully close this time~.

Ibara: Indeed! I deeply apologize about that, apologies come free of charge after all!

On a matter unrelated to Eden, I’ll have to give my apologies to Mr. Sakasaki later on as well~.

Tsumugi: …To Natsume-kun?

Natsume: HmM? I have no need for a blatantly insincere apology like thAT, thouGH?

Ibara: Don’t say that! Please accept my apology, please do ☆

Well, the show is going to start any moment now, so if you deem it unnecessary I will reluctantly give up!

I carelessly got caught up in the peculiar Yumenosaki spacetime. Just like His Highness said earlier, the stage is not the place for a conversation!

Let’s both carry out our missions, as idols ♪

Natsume: ...That goes without sayiNG.

(Why is he so composED? Is it just a front he puts ON? Is he hiding his agitation at the inevitable checkmate and using bluffs to keep up appearancES?)

(That’s not IT. I’m a liar tOO, that’s why I can teLL; this guy still has something up his sleeVE.)

Ibara: (...Is what he is probably thinking. Mr. Sakasaki is a fortune teller, and as such he seems to be skilled at reading other people’s expressions.)

(But while he’s focusing on that, he forgets that other people are able to see him just as well as he sees them.)

(When you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back… Fufufufu ♪ Of course I’ve still got something up my sleeve, even though I’m a snake born with no arms or legs!)

(Glib-tongued enough to even deceive a child of God**! “I” will claim my kingdom...!)

---------------

* Hiyori is referencing the expression “A sister-in-law torments like a thousand devils”.

** This can also mean “a young prodigy” but I wanted to keep the biblical reference. Also, he’s using “ore” in this line.

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